OUK HOMES. 



Nov. 



.speaking- of imaginain' things, I assure you, 

 for there is one home that I have I'ccently vis- 

 ited, from which I shall have to draw largely, 

 before I get through, and T earnestly hope I 

 may be able to show you the spirit of it, if 

 nothing more. When I say that the first stone 

 of the fouiKlation of all our Avork is to l)e the 

 most perfect good nature on all sides, many of 

 you may say that your homes possess it al- 

 ready, because you never have any downright 

 quarrels. This is all very good, but is not suffi- 

 cient for the foundation ice want. To illustrate: 



I passed a couple of days in a very pleasant 

 1'amily. receutl.v, and had been talking on this 

 same point. Husband, wife, and four pretty, 

 well behaved children, seemed to constitute 

 almost a model household. Well, on Sabbath 

 afternoon, I — it may be too earnestly — urged 

 that we should attend a Bible class, in charge 

 of a lady who was doing a great work of re- 

 formation in their town. The husband kindly 

 ottered to stay and take charge of their four 

 months old little one, and the consequence 

 was that almost before we knew it, two hours 

 Jiad passed. As we neared their home, our ani- 

 mated talk in regard to what we had witness- 

 ed, w»as interrupted by cries of the ])aby 

 which evidently touched the mother's heart at 

 once. 



"Why my dear husband ! how long has baby 

 been crying in this wayV" 



"She conmienced shortly after you left." 



"And you have allowed her to cry all this 

 tinie'r" 



"How could I help it? I did everything I 

 could think of ; dichi't expect yon would stay 

 so i:ery long." 



"I declare ! this is always just tlie way if I 

 go out and leave you with the baby." 



That was all; it was only a very little thing 

 but both looked pained and unhappy. This 

 v>'ore ott" after a time, and both were as pleas- 

 ant as usual ; ]>erfectl3^ right, perhaps you will 

 say, such liitle things are not worth taking up 

 and noticing again, but 1 cannot feel that it is 

 right. It seems to me that husbands and 

 wives — I Avould like to saj", or anybody else, 

 but they don't care so much for each other, 

 and are not so easily touched, — should never 

 s[)eak to each othei' in this way, or at least if 

 they do, they should acknowledge their error 

 as soon as their stubborn natures will come 

 into subjection. If you are tempted to think 

 ihis all trilling, rcmeml)er who it is that has 

 said, "he that ruleth himself is greater than he 

 that taketh a city." In the evening before 

 i'etiring I ventured to suggest that the speech 

 was hardly a kind one, and I recalled it to 

 mind. 



"But it is the truth ; it is just the way when 

 I leave him. with the baby !" 



Every time I repeat the little circumstance 

 in the presence of mothers, they seem with 

 one accord to agree that she was nearly if not 

 quite, justilied in s])eaking as she did. Now 

 perhaps T had better take care that I do not 

 become dictatorial, or get into argument, for 

 argument so often results onlj^ in strengthen- 

 ing both jjarties in eri'or, that I earnestly hope 

 I may avoid it. I also would avoid any lin- 

 gering disposition to excuse my own sex. 

 (:J ran ting that he had been very heartless in 

 allowing tlie baby to cry nearly two hours. 



what -was the very best thing to do under the 

 circumstances V or rather, what is best to do 

 under all circumstances where we are likelj' 

 to feel the least disposition to tell people 

 wherein they have lieen wrong while we have 

 l)een right, and to go even further, any dispo- 

 sition to complain of anybody or anything in 

 a fretful, faultfinding way, whatever the prov- 

 ocation may have been V Is it not possible; to 

 have such perfect command over ourselves 

 that instead of feeling the slightest disposition 

 to i-etaliate, we can coolly consider how best 

 any bad matter may be remedied, and at the 

 same time make the author of the mischief a 

 better man or woman, as the case may be? A 

 great part of the world prides itself on remem- 

 bering a favor, and on being fair and liberal 

 with those who have shown a similar spirit, 

 but in our model household we wish each 

 member to emphaiicuily bear in mind the glo- 

 rious doctrine of returning good for evil, and 

 that a blessijig follows from applying it, in 

 the most trivial actions as well as the greater 

 afl'airs of life. In regard to the baby I would 

 suggest that as soon as the state of affairs was 

 seen, the mother should at once assume all the 

 blame, if any blame there was, and mildly 

 apologise to the trout)led husband for her pro- 

 tracted stay; this would have at once brought 

 out his better self, even Iiad he performed his 

 duties indifferently; and by the way, in no 

 manner can a parent so well show that he "ru- 

 leth himself," as by being at all times ready to 

 take all the ])lame of any misunderstanding. 

 Show that your shoulders are broad, and that 

 you can bear to be blamed for that which you 

 iiave not done, and above all things, do not 

 fall into the cowardlj' habit of arguing ^over 

 "whose fault it was," ai the little things that 

 will continually go wrong. Careful investiga- 

 tion of the case in (juestion revealed the fact 

 that the tube of the bal)y's nursing-bottle was 

 of an inferior <iuality of rubber, and had be- 

 come so softened by the milk as to cause the 

 sides to adhere together, and so the "precious 

 little darling" had perhaj^s tugged away at it 

 until long after forl)earance hact ceased to be a 

 virtue, and then it had simply vented its right- 

 eous indignation toward all modern innova- 

 tions of whatever nature, that stood in the 

 way of supplying even such a little speck of 

 humanity with its needful nourishment. Its 

 papa doubtless after having "interviewed'" all 

 the machinery to the best of his inexperienced 

 judgment, concluded that it must be crying 

 simply to have its mamma come home, a feel- 

 ing in which he probably heartily joined at the 

 time, and so both waited in — guess we'll say 

 imiHitieiice , while the "long minutes" slowly 

 dragged b}'. Had the makers of these rubber 

 goods been faithful in little things, all this 

 might have been avoided, and I confess we all 

 indulged in some rather severe censures on the 

 way things were made "only to sell," but in 

 thinking of it since, I fear we did not do our 

 duty. JNIannfacturers, joblx'rs, retailers, aud 

 business nun generally, arc fellow creatui'es, 

 and are probably just as good, and just as con- 

 scientious as we are. Ask yourself if — when 

 j'ou are inclined to censure some one — you 

 would do any better if you were in the same 

 business or place. If you sa_y you would, we 

 must take it for granted that you are better 



