150 



GLEANINGS IN BEE CULTURE. 



April 



days, to win them back? A little blue eyed 

 girl came to our house, and as soon as she 

 was able to recognize the faces about her, 

 there seemed something in that little face, 

 that plead with me as from another world. 

 Have you ever watched a baby asleep? 

 Have you ever noticed the look of innocence 

 — that wonderful innocence that seems as 

 if it might reclaim a lost and ruined world— 

 that look, so beautiful, which appeals so 

 powerfully in its mute stillness? You all 

 know how often I have spoken of her, but 

 you little know how the image of her little 

 self held me when nothing else would. I 

 am crying now, as I think of it and of the 

 wicked life I then led; it is not the first time 

 I have cried over these Home Papers. I 

 taught her to lisp her first words, and as I 

 cheered her in her first attempts to bear her 

 weight on those little feet, I used to say, 

 "Away up high, papa's baby." As she 

 crowed with delight, and threw her little 

 arms about my neck, I felt, many and many 

 a time, the awful need there was for some- 

 body or something to lift her wicked papa 

 "away up high." She, the little, uncon- 

 scious child, was doing it. I did not believe 

 in the Bible, but I believed in being led by a 

 little child, for I knew she would lead me 

 safely, if I followed her. One could not have 

 been very bad under such influences, surely 

 not. The temptation is very strong to skip 

 what follows, but something tells me, if I 

 would save souls, it will be better not to do 

 so. 



My friends have generally supposed I 

 cared but little for dress in the other sex. I 

 do not care for expensive dress, and never 

 did. There were particular dresses I used 

 to ask my partner to wear ; I used to have 

 much to say about the way she w r ore her 

 hair, etc. tVhat I said may not have had 

 anything, in particular, to do with her ward- 

 robe, and I do not know that I have any rea- 

 son to think it had. However, there was 

 one particular summer dress, made, to my 

 eyes, exactly as it should be, that Satan 

 seemed to have fixed himself to. I am talk- 

 ing of trifles, but the mission of these papers 

 is to warn you, my friends, by telling you 

 what trifles may do. 



One morning, we three went out to see a 

 buckwheat field. As the horse was restless, 

 my wife held it, while my partner and I went 

 into the field to see the Italians at work. 

 She wore that dress I have spoken of. The 

 bees were humming on the .white blossoms, 



and it was a beautiful sight, but 1 think, 



my friends, I would better tell the plain 

 truth and admit that that summer dress in 

 the buckwheat field had driven all thought 

 of bees and everything else out of my head; 

 so much so, that my wife, who was near by 

 in the buggy, had called in vain, to let me 

 know that the horse was getting unruly, and 

 had finally been obliged to call on a man 

 near by, to take charge of him. 



I said, a few Nos. back, that I did not 

 know that God had ever spoken to me in 

 dreams. I do not know but that I shall re- 

 call that. Shortly after the event I have 

 mentioned, in a dream, my partner, with my 

 wife and children were on an excursion, as 

 we frequently went, and we stood on the 



shores of a lake or river. The children had 

 been picking up shells and skipping stones. 

 I had been busy by the side of my partner. 

 I passed my wife, who was standing alone 

 with the children. Our boy, who was about 

 10, had begun to notice the' state of things. 

 He was a manly little fellow, and as he stood 

 erect near his mother, I noticed the pained 

 look on his young face. His sister, about 8, 

 only looked wonderingly from one to the 

 other of us. Blue Eyes had just learned to 

 walk, and stood holding by her mother's 

 dress. My wife spoke slowly, in a quiet 

 voice. I hear her words now, clearly and 

 distinctly. 



"Amos, the time has come, when you must 

 decide whether you care more for your part- 

 ner than for your wife and children. I wish 

 you to feel that you are free to leave us if 

 you prefer to. We will do the best we can." 



I looked at my boy, at his sister, at my 

 wife, and admired, more than I ever did be- 

 fore, her calm, womanly bearing amid trou- 

 ble. I looked at little Blue Eyes tipping one 

 way and the other on account of the uncer- 

 tain footing which the gravel furnished for 

 those little feet, and I thought of the four 

 loved ones, for I did love them, taking their 

 journey through life alone. Again I would 

 have breathed the prayer, "O, God! have 

 mercy on a poor frail mortal!" But there 

 was no God. There certainly was no God 

 for me then, for as I turned my face, I saw 

 my partner walking carelessly, at a little dis- 

 tance ; she wore the dress mentioned. She 

 gave me a glance which I understood to be 

 one of encouragement, and, as in the case of 

 my right arm, I left all, and followed her. 

 Do you remember the first two lines of the 

 little hymn in the Jan. No.? 



"Jesus, I my cross have taken, 

 All to leave and follow Ihce." 



Can you, as you view the two inspiring 

 motives, catch a glimpse of the awful dis- 

 tance that yawns between the man who is 

 following Christ, and the one who is follow- 

 ing his own selfish inclinations. The lines 

 of that little hymn have gone all through my 

 life, in the past two months, and that Jan. 

 journal has gone through homes all over our 

 land, through revival meetings, and neigh- 

 borhoods (has even gone to India), has con- 

 verted men, through God's grace, and has 

 done good, without doubt, that I shall never 

 dream of. How about the spirit of the other? 



I awoke from the troubled dream, and was 

 glad it was a dream, but yet, so far as I was 

 concerned, it was not a dream after all. I 

 remembered well the crazy intoxication of 

 thinking the way was clear, and reason as I 

 could, I could not help feeling that if I were 

 subjected to the exact test I saw in my 

 dream, I should do exactly as I did there. I 

 know just how helpless that brother, men- 

 tioned in the beginning of this chapter, was, 

 when he told me that was a horse he could 

 not guide. I have since learned that my 

 wife was, at that time, very near the point 

 where I saw her in the dream. So far as my 

 partner was concerned, I believe the dream 

 entirely at fault; God's purpose was simply 

 to show me how little able I was to stand 

 temptation, should I have to pass such an 

 ordeal, and I had been weighed and found 



