A BABOO CHESTNUT. 147 



as a type-writing machine— and, like it, he executes auto- 

 matically and admirably the work of the groove in which he 

 moves. But he is as incapable as any machine of acting on 

 las own initiative, or assuming any responsibility. It would 

 be as reasonable to suppose that a machine had volition, as 

 to expect that a baboo would act independently in a 

 situation not provided for by " Regulations and Standing- 

 Orders." The smaller railway stations only boast as a rule 

 two baboo specimens— the station-master and telegraph 

 clerk. 



There is an Indian " Joe Miller " that once a telegram 

 was received by the traffic superintendent at Calcutta, from 

 the baboo at some distant little railway station. 



"Calcutta mall due, tiger at points. What shall do? 

 Waiting orders. 1 ' 



Then a minute later came a frantic appeal — 



' Tiger in station. Baboo on roof. Wire in- 

 structions." 



I am afraid this is an old chestnut; but it typifies 

 perfectly the baboo mind. 



Lahore, December 7th. — We arrived here early in the 

 morning, and for the next two or three days were very busy 

 preparing for our expedition to the Salt Ranges. Our cook 

 was home-sick, and wished to return to Kashmir ; and with 

 him we sent back Khadra— the second shikari, and the other 

 coolies. 



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