The Side-Show 197 



talk turned upon Calif ornian wines. **As a matter 

 of fact," said the parson, "most of the vineyards 

 now in full bearing don't pay, because the wrong 

 varieties were planted out. My poor father made 

 that mistake, and he was forced to root up every 

 vine." My friend told me this story (he had heard, 

 of course, the sermon), and I asked him if he had 

 allowed the parson to escape without a word of pro- 

 test. " If I had let him know that I heard his ser- 

 mon I should have spoiled the side-show. Now 

 whenever we meet I shall have it all to myself." 

 I remember another story, told to me by a 

 gambler. A gambler in the West is higher by 

 a few rungs of the social ladder than the white- 

 coated gentleman who dispenses drinks across a 

 bar. I gleaned this important fact from a bar- 

 tender many years ago. I had asked if a certain 

 friend of his tended bar. " What ! " he exclaimed, 

 " tend bar ? Not on your life. He plays — keerds." 

 My gambler was a character, as indeed are most of 

 these knights of the green cloth ; and he was not 

 averse to relating -— to sympathetic ears — his ad- 

 ventures by land and sea. He had heard, it seems, 

 that a notorious poker-player had taken passage 

 upon a certain steamer, where high play was not 

 forbidden (as it is to-day on nearly all steamship 

 lines). Billy (my friend) wishing to shiver a lance 

 with this champion also booked his passage, and 

 so in due time Greek met Greek. " Of course," said 

 Billy, in telling the story, " I played 'possum, and 

 Mister Man had n't a notion that I knew the very 

 first thing about poker ; but he did know that I had 

 about four thousand dollars in my inside pocket 



