302 THE HOME, FARM AND BUSINESS CYCLOPEDIA. 



the first thing a man of sense, proper feeling, and candour should do, is to 

 endeavour to learn the objections of the parents, to see whether they can- 

 not be removed. If they are based upon his present insufficiency of 

 means, a lover of a persevering spirit may effect much in removing appre- 

 hension on that score, by cheerfully submitting to a reasonable time of 

 probation, in the hope of amelioration in his worldly circumstances. 

 Happiness delayed will be none the less precious when love has stood the 

 test of constancy and the trial of time. Should the objection be founded 

 on inequality of social position, the parties, if young, may wait until 

 matured age shall ripen their judgment and place the future more at their 

 own disposal. A clandestine marriage should be peremptorily declined. 

 In too many cases it is a fraud committed by an elder and more experi- 

 enced party upon one whose ignorance of the world's ways, and whose 

 confiding tenderness appeal to him for protection even against himself. 

 In nearly all the instances we have known of such marriages, the result 

 proved the step to have been ill-judged, imprudent, and highly injurious 

 to the reputation of one party, and in the long run detrimental to the 

 happiness of both. 



Conduct of the Engaged Couple, 



The conduct of the bridegroom-elect should be marked by a gallant and 

 affectionate assiduity towards his lady-love a denouement easily felt 

 and understood, but not so easy to define. That of the lady towards him 

 should manifest delicacy, tenderness, arid confidence : while looking for 

 his thorough devotion to herself, she should not captiously take offence 

 and show airs at his showing the same kind of attention to other ladies 

 as she, in her turn, would not hesitate to receive from the other sex. 



In the behaviour of a gentleman towards his betrothed in public, little 

 difference should be perceptible from his demeanour to other ladies, except 

 in those minute attentions which none but those who love can properly 

 understand or appreciate. 



In private, the slightest approach to indecorous familiarity must be 

 avoided ; indeed it is pretty certain to be resented by every woman who 

 deserves to be a bride. The lady's honour is now in her lover's hands, 

 and he should never forget in his demeanour^to and before her that that 

 lady is to be his future wife. 



It is the privilege of the betrothed lover, as it is also his duty, to give 

 advice to the fair one who now implicitly confides in him. Should he 

 detect a fault, should he observe failings which he would wish removed 



