264 silt FRANCIS BACON S APOLOGY 



principal counsellors send for us of the learned coun 

 sel, and notify her majesty s pleasure unto us ; save 

 that it was said to me openly by one of them, that 

 her majesty was not yet resolved whether she would 

 have me forborn in the business or no. And here 

 upon might arise that other sinister and untrue 

 speech, that, I hear, is raised of me, how I was a 

 suitor to be used against my lord of Essex at that 

 time : for it is very true, that I that knew well what 

 had passed between the queen and me, and what oc 

 casion I had given her both of distaste and distrust, 

 in crossing her disposition, by standing stedfastly 

 for my lord of Essex, and suspecting it also to be a 

 stratagem arising from some particular emulation, I 

 writ to her two or three words of compliment, signi 

 fying to her majesty, &quot; That if she would be pleased 

 &quot; to spare me in my lord of Essex s cause, out of the 

 &quot; consideration she took of my obligation towards 

 &quot; him, I should reckon it for one of her greatest fa- 

 &quot; vours : but otherwise desiring her majesty to think 

 &quot; that I knew the degrees of duties ; and that no 

 &quot; particular obligation whatsoever to any subject 

 &quot; could supplant or weaken that entireness of duty 

 &quot; that I did owe and bear to her and her service.&quot; 

 And this was the goodly suit I made, being a respect 

 no man that had his wits could have omitted : but 

 nevertheless I had a farther reach in it ; for I judged 

 that day s work would be a full period of any bitter 

 ness or harshness between the queen and my lord : 

 and therefore, if I declared myself fully according to 

 her mind at that time, which could not do my lord 



