THE TIM BUNKER PAPERS. 1CT 



any difficulty in making the smoke follow the inside of 

 the chimney, until it gets up in the air out of your way. 

 Kow, I admit that lightning is a little more dangerous to 

 handle than smoke, but it follows certain laws, just as 

 straight as smoke does. You see, lightning has what the 

 philosophers call an affinity for iron, and it follows the out 

 side of a rod, just as smoke does the inside of a chimney. 

 Some say it goes down, and others say it goes up. At any 

 rate, it sticks to the rod, and so passes off without doing 

 any damage, just as smoke sticks to the chimney. If you 

 want to know why it does that, I will tell you when you 

 can tell why smoke goes up chimney. It follows the road 

 that is built for it, just as regularly as a locomotive follows 

 the railroad.&quot; 



&quot; An engine would go rather promiscuous, Squire, if t 

 wa nt for them ere rails,&quot; said Seth Twiggs, as he blew 

 an extra puff from his pipe, illustrating that smoke would 

 go where it was sent, when it did not follow a chimney. 



&quot; But that ain t a fair argument,&quot; said Deacon Little, 

 &quot; you know it ain t, Tim Bunker, you infidel. We make 

 smoke and can control it, but the Almighty makes the 

 lightning.&quot; 



&quot; Well, Deacon,&quot; I asked, &quot; What have you put shingles 

 upon your house for ?&quot; 



&quot; Why, to shed rain, of course.&quot; 



&quot; Very well,&quot; said I, &quot; and the Almighty makes the 

 rain, if he don t make smoke ; and if a man is to be wet, 

 he will be, and you can t help it by putting shingles over 

 his head, or by any other instrumentality. It is no use 

 tampering with what Noah s deluge was made of.&quot; 



The Deacon saw he was caught, and looked over to Mr. 

 Spooner for help. He always believes in Mr. Spooner s 

 orthodoxy, when he sides with himself, otherwise he is 

 heretical. 



&quot; I do not see how you can get round the Squire s argu 

 ment against shingles,&quot; remarked Mr. Spooner, rather dryly. 



