NO EMIGRATION. 93 



more at a time as occasion requires. In this partition, 

 which we will call a bar, place one of the quack doctors, and 

 after he has locked himself in, let him give out drams of 

 whiskey, &quot; Jamaica spirits,&quot; (best rum), &quot; bitters,&quot; (any kind 

 of liquor taken in a morning ostensibly for procuring an ap 

 petite), &quot; sling,&quot; &quot; black strap,&quot; &c., from a tier of yellow 

 painted kegs, standing behind him, with gin, whisky, &c. in 

 large letters on them, to the others, as they pace up and 

 down the room. By the time they have all taken a &quot; drink&quot; 

 or two a-piece, and* swallowed a mouthful of water after it, 

 you will hear &quot; guessing&quot; and &quot; calculating&quot; enough, un 

 doubtedly, and something better, &quot;I don t think!&quot; Be care 

 ful they do not tread on your toes at this time, and if you 

 wish to retain a seat, do not get up from it even for a &quot; York 

 minute.&quot; A &quot; word to the wise,&quot; &c. : You must not sup 

 pose them impudent or intruding if they sit down before you, 

 or stand betwixt you and the fire, with their backs to it; nor 

 must you be offended at the number of questions that maybe 

 put about your own business and concerns, not even at being 

 asked if you are an honest man ; all this is only the exercise 

 of the refinements of a superior liberty and freedom ! Some 

 of them will smoke cigars, and others chew tobacco, therefore 

 be careful, and keep a &quot; good look-out.&quot; If you wish to be 

 cleanly, you had better not leave any furniture in the room, 

 as they generally carry &quot; Roger s penknives&quot; about them. 

 A few pieces of pine splints, or other woods, put into the 

 room, will, perhaps, keep them from &quot; whittling&quot; the chairs, 

 tables, and window frame, and, as the saying goes, &quot; they 

 will make something of them.&quot; You must not be moved 

 should they cast foul abuse and slander on their relation 

 John Bull ; this is one of the most delightful privileges 

 &quot; uncle Sam&quot; and &quot; brother Jonathan&quot; enjoy ! It would be 

 a pity to debar them from such a cheap and innocent amuse 

 ment, that hurts nobody. But hark ! the horns blow and 

 bells ring to call the hull of them hum (home) &quot; right away 

 straight&quot; to a dinner of&quot; fat pork and molasses, &quot;then &quot;Johnny 

 cake and pumpkin pie.&quot; After you have awakened &quot; them 

 are two men asleep on the benches,&quot; (who were &quot; high &quot; 

 when they came in, and full of &quot; develtry,&quot; having been on 

 a drinking &quot; scale&quot; of late) and cleaned out the room, I will 

 drop the curtain and leave you to ruminate on a scene in an 

 American tavern, while I proceed on my journey. Took a 



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