I843-44- D AYS OF MOURNING. IJI 



sinless, sympathizing High Priest's promised help for him 

 in his last extremity. That it was given I do not doubt. 

 That last and precious verse of the eighth chapter of 

 Romans would alone give me the assurance that it was. 



" His death makes a great blank to me greater, indeed, 

 than that of any other friend of my own sex can make. We 

 have grown up together, physically and intellectually. There 

 were great dissimilarities between us, but we had so much 

 in common that these rather increased our love for each 

 other. I never knew how much I loved him till now, how 

 worthy he was of being loved, how unkind I often was to 

 him. I have tried in vain all last week to get through a 

 little needful work. Had it been hand-work, I could have 

 done it ; but I had to think and write, and my mind 

 wandered always to the thought of my dear cousin taken 

 away. I can unburden my heart to you, and confess that I 

 have wept more this week than ever before since childhood, 

 without fearing you will think me less a man or a Christian 

 for that. 



" I am now calm, and able to think of James as I should 

 wish ever to do. The thought of him is so mingled with 

 everything I do, that no effort could detach him if I wished 

 it. But I thank God he has made the memory so precious. 

 The presence of a glorified spirit is something only to rejoice 

 in. This is selfish, however. ... I bear up well, and walk 

 about alone with the help of a stick. I could forget my 

 whole winter's work, willingly and easily, were it not that I 

 feel it was the means of keeping me away from James's side. 

 This will make the thought of last winter full of bitter- 

 ness. ... 



"... I thank God devoutly that I was able in this 

 predicament to guide myself by his commandments. Pray 

 for me that I may be able to witness a good confession 



