TANTALISING NOVELTIES 



We have invested in three and sixpence worth of new 

 fertiliser guaranteed to " produce an appearance like dark 

 green Utrecht velvet in ten days on the roughest lawn." 

 " Would you like your lawn to look like that, Madam ? " 

 asked the red-headed youth in charge of squares that didn't 

 look in the least like real grass, but a kind of artificial 

 compound as above mentioned. 



"Very much!" said one of us, who was struck by the 

 unnatural hue and smoothness of the exhibit."" Do mind 

 the sun on your head ! " she added parenthetically to the 

 delicate member of our party, who is always on her mind. 

 " Oh, pray Madam, do not trouble to shade me," said 

 the red-haired youth modestly. " I am quite all right, I 

 assure you." 



We had a vision of Loki's Ma-Ma in her quaint Directoire 

 dress, all striped black-and-cream chiffon and dim orange, 

 with her absurd little Directoire tulle hat and its one 

 coquettish rose (absurd but not unbecoming) spending the 

 rest of the afternoon in sudden philanthropic frenzy, 

 shading the red-haired youth from the July sunshine, while 

 he volubly touted for orders for patent fertilisers! In- 

 nately polite, we explained. He was not in the least 

 abashed. 

 " I do feel it very hot," he remarked simply. 



165 



