The Old Dover Boad. Ill 



by land and water, and I know one excellent gentleman, 

 now, whose bill I should like to hold for £100,000 for dis- 

 count in Lombard Street, who commenced life by hawking 

 fruit and fish, and who attributes his success in the world 

 to having earned something every day, and only spending 

 sixpence out of every shilling. '' How did you manage,^ 

 asked an old friend, ''when you were in Maidstone gaoffor 

 smuggling ? you could not earn money then." " Yes, I 

 did," he answered, '' for the barber was ill, and I contracted 

 to shave the prisoners at a halfpenny a head." Smuggling 

 went on to a great extent, as, independently of the sea''- 

 board, there were many villages on the Medway in which 

 ilHcit trade was carried on. The undertakers, whether 

 innocently or not, once assisted in a large smuggKng trans- 

 action. An announcement appeared in the papers that an 

 English lady, the wife of some celebrated foreigner, had 

 died abroad, and the body was to be sent home for burial. 

 The time of its arrival was communicated by the undertaker 

 to the clergyman in each village through which the body 

 was to pass, and a guinea was sent for having the bell tolled, 

 which was duly done. The hearse and six, and two mourn- 

 ing coaches and four, with black velvet trappings and 

 feathers, made a grand show, and the foreigners who 

 accompanied the body as mourners received mucl^ attention 

 where they stopped for refreshment. The Custom House 

 officers knew that a large cargo of lace had been landed, and 

 searched all suspected coaches and carriages, and racked 

 their brains to trace the smuggled goods in vain, but they 

 never suspected " their dear departed sister," in the shape 

 of a cargo of lace, packed in a very large coffin, was taken 

 to London and buried, and dug up again. Let us hope 

 that the beautiful service for the dead was not read over 

 it ; but smugglers were not over particular. 



On another occasion a quantity of lace was known to 



