898 



THE AMERICAN BEE KEEPER. 



29 



Sold the Machine. 



The book agent, the sewiug machiiiG 

 geut, the insurance agent, have each 

 nd all won distinction by their persever- 

 ance, but the agent of the washing ma- 

 :hiue is worth his weight in gold to the 

 lOuse for which he travels if all there 

 s said about him in the following is 

 rue: 



Exasperated Woman of the House — I 

 lave told yon a dozen times I don't 

 vaut the machine. Sic him, Tige! 



Agent (while the dog is gnawing his 

 eg) — Don't want the machine, ma'am? 

 i'ardon me, you haven't yet seen half 

 ts good points. It washes the clothes 

 :leaner than any other and in less than 

 lalf the time. It never tears off a but- 

 on. It"— 



"Good heavens! Don't you see what 

 he dog is doing?" 



"Yes. quite a playful animal. This 

 nachine, ma'am, uses less soap, takes up 

 ess room" — 



"He'll tear you to pieces if you don't 

 ?o. Run, for mercy's sake. He's tasted 

 alood, and I'm afraid I can't stop him 

 30W. ' ' 



"I have to put up with such things, 

 ma'am, and it's a good cause. This ma- 

 chine is the best one that ever was in- 

 h vented. If I can succeed in introducing 

 one into a family, I always feel that I 

 have done a benevolent act. You can 

 use any kind of water, hard or soft, 

 hot or" — 



"Oh, no, no! He'll kill you. What is 

 the machine worth?" 



"Ifsworth 11,000,000 to any family, 

 but I'm selling it for only $5, and" — 



"Here's ycur money. I'll take it. 

 Tige, Tige! Let go!" 



Looks as if we were going to have 

 rain. Well, I must be going. Good aft- 

 ernoon, ma'am." — Sewing Machine 

 Times. 



The New ICiiglancl Sleeting House. 



The New England meeting house was 

 generally a square wooden box, but it 

 showed excellent taste in the detail of 

 its simple ornamentation. It is the the- 

 ory of some thoughtful architects that 

 among the early colonial immignaits 

 were men considerably above the abil- 

 ity of ordinary carpenters. In ti.o.sR 

 days the architect was apt to Le I', lii 

 designer and builder, and it was r i '.a 



^is country until very modern times 

 that the line was at all clearly drawn 

 between the architect who designed and 

 superintended in the interests of his 

 client, and so became a professional man, 

 and the builder who took a contract to 

 execute the work and make what he 

 could out of it, and remained a business 

 man. It is believed that the excellent 

 taste and judgment of these men among 

 the colonists made themselves felt in 

 the taste of the ornamentation in what 

 we call colonial architecture. They had 

 no originality in the general design of 

 buildings, because their experience had 

 never included that, but they knew how 

 to carry out to perfection details of the 

 ensemble. — William' B. Eigelow in 

 Scribuer's. 



The Troubles of Ireland. 



On one occasion Hartley Coleridge 

 had listened with deep apparent inter- 

 est to the voluble discourse of a well 

 known Iri^h enthusiast who spent 

 much of his time traveling about Eng- 

 land and enlightening the English mind 

 on the subject of popish errors, especial- 

 ly in Ireland. After dinner Hartley re- 

 quested to L -^ presented to a man so re- 

 markable. On the presentation he took 

 the far famed traveler and philosopher 

 by the arm, while a fev*' of the guests 

 gathered around, and addressed him 

 with awful solemnity, "Sir, there are 

 two great evils in Ireland." "There 

 are indeed, sir, " replied the Irish guest, 

 "but please to name them." "The 

 first," resumed Hartley, "is — popery!" 

 "It is," said the other, "but how won- 

 derful that you should have discovered 

 that! Now tell me what is the second 

 great evil." "Protestantism!" was 

 Hartley's reply in a voice of thunder 

 as he ran av\ ay screaming with laugh- 

 ter. His new acciuaintance remained 

 panic stricken. — "Recollections of Au- 

 brey de Yere. " 



Its Great Charm. 



"Yes, we went all over Europe, but 

 papa really only enjoyed himself in 

 Venice. " 



"Ah, yes, no wonder. The gondolas, 

 St. Mark s, the Rialto, the" — 



"Oh, it wasn't that. But he could 

 sit in the hotel, you know, and fish out 

 of the Minclcw. '" — London Fun. 



