16 COACHING. 



" Resolved to visit a far-distant friend, 

 A porter to the Bull and Gate I send, 

 And bid the man at all events engage 

 Some place or other in the Chester stage. 

 The man returns — ' 'Tis done as soon as said, 

 Your Honour's sure when once the money's paid. 

 My brother whip, impatient of delay. 

 Puts too at three and swears he cannot stay.' 

 (Four dismal hours ere the break of day.) 

 Roused from sound sleep — thrice called — at length I rise, 

 Yawning, stretch out my arms, half closed my eyes ; 

 By steps and lanthorn enter the machine. 

 And take my place, how cordially, between 

 Two aged matrons of excessive bulk, 

 To mend the matter, too, of meaner folk ; 

 While in like mood, jammed in on t'other side, 

 A bullying captain and a fair one ride. 

 Foolish as fair, and in whose lap a boy — 

 Our plague eternal, but her only joy. 

 At last, the glorious number to complete. 

 Steps in my landlord for that bodkin seat ; 

 When soon, by every hillock, rut, and stone, 

 In each other's faces by turns we're thrown. 

 This grandam scolds, that coughs, the captain swears. 

 The fair one screams, and has a thousand fears ; 

 While our plump landlord, trained in other lore. 

 Slumbers at ease, nor yet ashamed to snore ; 

 And Master Dicky, in his mother's lap. 

 Squalling, at once brings up three meals of pap. 

 Sweet company ! Next time, I do protest, Sir, 

 I'd walk to Dublin, ere I ride to Chester !" 



As Dean Swiffc died in 1745, at the green old 

 aire of seventy-eight, the above lines were pro- 



