324 CONFESSIONS OF A BEACHCOMBER 



" Well, you get plenty." 



" N-a-hr ! No get 'em. Get 'em corn (with a spit) all 

 asame horse." 



Hominy, with prayer, is the standing dish at that station. 



HUMAN NATURE 



Among the most cunning of civilised blacks was a 

 gentleman, well up in years, known as Michael Edward. 

 He had been everywhere and had seen everything, and 

 was full of what we call worldly wisdom. His conceit in 

 himself led him to eat abundantly, drink all he could and 

 at anybody's expense, smoke continuously, do as little 

 work as possible, though apparently with lavish expenditure 

 of industry, dress flashily and talk big. In pursuit of 

 these things he behaved as should a cute student of human 

 nature. Sent by Mrs Jenkins, his then mistress, with a 

 message, he arrived as some tempting pastry was taken 

 from the oven. He eyed it all with such riotous admira- 

 tion, that an invitation to taste a tart was felt compulsory. 

 Michael Edward assented with a "Yus, please, Missis." 

 The tart was but a trifle light as air in his capacious maw, 

 and another went the same way with loud smacking of 

 huge lips. Then, with a lively sense of the continuance of 

 such favour, he said " My word, Missis, you mo' better 

 cook than Missis Jenkin ! " 



A police magistrate had a blackfellow in his employ 

 very much addicted to beer. The black was brought 

 before His Worship charged as a " drunk and disorderly." 

 The magistrate lectured him severely, but paid his fine on 

 condition that he would never drink again. A month 

 later the culprit was again in the court, and the magistrate, 

 who was rather in love with his own eloquence, proceeded 

 to read the offender a severe lecture and to threaten him 

 with awful punishment. At the most impressive point the 

 black broke in with " Go on, Croker ! Shut up and pay 

 'em money. Me want finish 'em fence ! " 



