FIFTY YEARS OF A SHOWMAN'S LIFE 



about the middle of the 'seventies, and then mis- 

 fortunes came thick and fast. Everything and 

 everybody seemed to be leagued against the 

 British farmer ; Providence even, as represented 

 by the weather, included. He was told of all 

 kinds of panaceas, most of them quite impractic- 

 able, by hosts of people who knew as much 

 about farming as they did of ballooning. He was 

 urged by politicians and others to give up corn- 

 growing altogether, and go in for jam-making, 

 tobacco-raising, fruit-growing, poultry-farming, 

 and heaven knows what else, and was reproached 

 for his obstinacy in not changing almost in a 

 minute all the habits and traditions of a life- 

 time in order to take up matters of which he 

 had no previous experience. I have unearthed 

 the following lines, written at this time, which 

 pretty accurately represent the disabilities under 

 which the agriculturist of the period felt he was 

 suffering. 



" Oh, everything's against us, and we cannot get relief. 

 The Yankees undersell us with their corn and frozen beef. 

 And now the latest remedy, which sounds much like a joke, 

 Is ' go in for fo&crcco,' but that's bound to end in smoke. 

 It's all up with farming, and we're all ruined quite, 

 The weather's nearly always wrong, the prices never right ; 

 The labourer we have to pay more wages, or he strikes, 

 And now he's got a vote what's more, he votes which way he likes. 

 John Barleycorn's against us, too, like all the rest, oh, dear ! 

 For when they took the tax off malt they clapt it on the beer. 

 And when we make good butter, then the trade for that they squash, 

 For grocers push their * margarine,' their ' butterine,' and ' bosh.' 

 We're told by Fleet Street journalists and city denizens 

 The road to fortune we should find in breeding cocks and hens. 

 But though we've borne all this and more, and stood it like a lamb ; 

 * The last straw ' was when Gladstone said * Pin all your faith to 

 jam.' " 



