No. 3. 



Dialogue between a Father and Son. 



79 



put in practice the lazy farmer's recipe for 

 ridding iiis land of weeds — " make it so poor 

 that tiiey will not grow !" Now that's prac- 

 tical farming without tlieory. 



Grahb. — Bat what shall I do for want of 

 the straw which I depended upon as fodder for 

 the cattle during next winter ? 



Oats. — Is that all your dependence for the 

 next winter .' Why your cattle will be ready 

 to eat you ! and you will have to practise the 

 other part of the recipe, " to prevent cattle 

 from dying of starvation — kill them." But 1 

 give you warning ; neither they or you must 

 expect any thing from me ; if I can hold my 

 own, 'twill be as much as I shall do. 



No. 5. Clover. Grabb. — Why you look 

 healthy and well, but how is it that you have 

 made so little progress in height'? . There's | 

 Farmer Sykes' clover as high as my knees, 

 and will be soon fit for the scythe ! but I am 

 unfortunate in every thing! 



Clover. — That's a true word, although it is 

 not spoken in jest. Why you seem to forget 

 that as soon as I had made a little progress in 

 growth, you turned in all your starving cat- 

 tle, horses and sheep, which not only eat up 

 tlie branch, but also the root ! 



Grabb. — Ah ! that I was compelled to do 

 to keep them from starving — but you had all 

 th3 benefit of their manure while they were 

 feeding you. 



Clover. — You call that manure? why it 

 was, the greatest part, nothing but worms and 

 bots — and the little good that remained was 

 soon carried off by the grasshoppers and bugs, 

 which were about as much in want of it as I ! i 

 My fear is, that the hot weather, which seems 

 now to be setting in, will scorch the land, so 

 unprotected by foliage, and dry up the scanty 

 crop which is left, before it is high enough 

 for the scythe — and then, what do you think 

 your horses will say to you ? If you had done 

 as Farmer Sykes did, you would have deserved 

 his success; you must remember, how, that 

 instead of feeding off his young crop, he top 

 dressed it with a compost of lime and eartli 

 and dung, which had been carefully prepared 

 in the winter, and well pulverized ; by which, 

 not only his present crop is doubly benefited, 

 but it is also preparatory to an autumn sowing 

 of wheat on the lay. Now put this and that 

 together, and calculate the result. First, two 

 tons of hay per acre, the first cutting ; one 

 ton per acre the second, with a capital after- 

 math for his dairy; and if wheat is sown by 

 the 29th of September, a yield of forty bush- 

 els per acre might be expected at next year's 

 harvest; and this is not all — for after the 

 wheat is carried, the land will be turned, and 

 the clover stubble, perfectly rotted, will form 

 an excellent seed bed for buckwheat, with the 

 expectation of a heavy crop. Now I will 

 leave you to calculate the value of my second 



crop, (remember, you have already had the 

 first cutting, and a severe cutting it was) and 

 of course you do not expect much at the third ; 

 while seventeen bushels of wheat per acre 

 next harvest, will be quite as much as you 

 have any right to expect ; and common justice 

 will not allow you to sow buckwheat after. 



Grabb. — Wliy, you are one of Job's com- 

 forters ! 



Clover. — But I cannot see that you have 

 any claim to the character of Job-— for " In 

 all this. Job sinned not," remember. 



No. 6. Potatoes. Grabb.— Well, I don't 

 know how it is, but while others are digging 

 new potatoes, it does not appear that I shall 

 ever have any to dig ! I think I may as well 

 leave you to your fate, for you'll certainly 

 never be worth the labor of cleaning. 



Potatoes. — Now you cannot be ignorant of 

 the fact, that for two months after tlie crops 

 of others were up, you were only talking of 

 planting your's ; and all the while the weeds 

 were growing on, what you called your fal- 

 low, until some of them were as high as your 

 head and full of seed ; we were then tumbled in 

 all together, and have ever since been striving 

 for the mastery ; but you have now sealed our 

 fate, and must take the consequences. 'Twas 

 fortunate for you, was it not ? that your father 

 lived before you, for he would find it difficult 

 to live after you ! 



No. 7. The Cows in pasture. Grabb.- — 

 Well, you have more grass than you can eat, 

 however, you can't grumble — that's one com- 

 fort. 



Cows. — Grass, do you call if? 

 Grabb. — Yes I do ; — and what do you call 

 it? 



Cows. — Why, we were just saying, it 

 would puzzle a Philadelphia lawyer to say 

 what it is; but judging by the smell as well 

 as the taste, it might be called garlic, with- 

 out offending against the statute of truth. 



Grabb. — Well, you are all alike ! Did'nt 

 I let you feed oiT the crop of clover, almost 

 before it was out of the ground ? 



Cows. — That's fJict ! Indeed we were at 

 last obliged to dig for it, and you will feel the 

 effects next winter, or we are no conjurers. 



Grabb. — Ah, I had need be a conjurer to 

 know how to satisfy you all ; but what have 

 you done with the sheep ] 



Cows. — What, these large bodied, long- 

 wooled animals, for which you gave in ex- 

 change, your small breed, which, even tken, 

 could only just keep body and soul together, 

 by picking the short herbage of the pasture? 

 Oh I we have done nothing with them, but 

 they have at last been able to do sninelhing 

 for themselves, for finding it impossible to 

 subsist on such short commons, and that they 

 were growing less every day, they sought 

 for a hole in the fence, and by waiting until 



