" FLUNKEYISM 97 



extent to do the flunkey. One holds one's tongue 

 for no better reason than because one has to earn 

 one*s pay. My own first fright has amused me ever 

 since. It was a young man from up-country, of 

 the smart, cute, commercial sort; a decent enough 

 fellow in his way, no doubt; but he didn't know 

 how to treat a hired man. Therefore I sat on 

 him severely, with my best brand of dignity, and 

 before we came ashore the unfortunate young man 

 was calling me sir. 'Good night, sir,' he said, 

 handing over his couple of shillings. . . . But 

 that sort of thing doesn't do. I've had to learn 

 better since. In a boat, sometimes, a sudden gust 

 of hilarity strikes me, on realising that, like those 

 horrid children who no longer exist outside old 

 people's recollections, I have to be seen and not 

 heard, and wait to speak until I am spoken to. I 

 burst out laughing at myself. The frights think 

 I am grinning at them. And the fat's in the fire 

 again. 



To do the flunkey really well is a work of art 

 and artfulness, worthy of respect; for how else 

 should authors, painters, and musicians be respected, 

 who, except they Ignore their public altogether, are 

 brain-flunkeys? Indeed, we are all of us flunkeys 

 in one fashion or another. Flunkeylsm does not 



H 



