AMATEUR THEATRICALS 179 



kitchen-ware of wood, iron, and tin, and I was 

 ordered, under terrific penalties, to produce a 

 play deftly woven round these homely articles, 

 having for its scene some rural forum such as 

 the country store, the post office, the town- 'us or 

 the school-'us. 



The evening came, the neighbors arrived. 

 There was the hurried moving of stage props, a 

 terrific hammering behind the curtain, calls for 

 hammers, nails, and laths, entreaties to "get off 

 my head!" sarcastic reminders to "kindly step 

 off my fingers"; queries as to "where are you 

 going with my step-ladder ?" and "who had the 

 rouge last ?" mingled with occasional and fearful 

 crashes as hurrying people with stage furniture 

 collided, and a general alarm when the curtain 

 suddenly blazed up from a careless candle. 



In front of the curtain chairs were being ar- 

 ranged in convergent rows. Rocking-chairs, 

 leather-backed chairs, lounging chairs, dining- 

 room chairs, kitchen, old derelicts from the attic, 

 splint-seated from the store room, and every kind 

 and nature of hassock and footstool. People were 

 arriving and greeting one another in shouts, the 

 noise behind the curtain being such as to render 

 communication in the ordinary tone of voice 

 impossible. Finally, the uproar ceased and the 

 hoarse tones of the stage-manager subdued to a 

 husky but perfectly audible whisper were heard 



