220 FARMING IT 



for his words were perfectly audible and he was 

 well known to them. 



For a full minute I must have stood staring 

 at him. Then I asked for his warrant, and he 

 handed me one. I opened it and found it was 

 regularly issued by a justice on a complaint 

 signed by old Cyrus Pettigrew, charging me with 

 "cruelty in burning, cutting, branding, and 

 otherwise torturing a certain Jersey cow then 

 and there in my charge and custody, or wilfully 

 permitting and allowing said animal then and 

 there in my custody as aforesaid to be burned, 

 cut, branded or otherwise tortured." 



In a flash the whole scheme dawned on me 

 and I could not help admiring the old rascal's 

 devilish ingenuity in planning the details, and 

 at the same time his inevitable disgust and fury 

 when the truth was known. 



In the meantime I was in the most unpleasant 

 and ridiculous position imaginable; but one's 

 mind works quickly, and I instantly told the 

 audience that I was arrested for cruelty to ani- 

 mals, that if they would kindly watch the papers 

 for the outcome of the trial, which I was sure 

 would be interesting to them, and defer judg- 

 ment to that time, I would fill my engagement 

 and finish my lecture. 



The audience applauded, the sheriff took a 

 seat on the platform, grinning good-naturedly, 



