314 GETS DOWN-SPIRITED. CHAP. xix. 



years ago, I saw the dark clouds gathering close about 

 me ; and now it has all come true. Often was I on the 

 point of leaving. But infatuated procrastination always 

 whispered, ' Try again.' I did ' try again,' but it was of 

 no use. It only led to further loss. And losing, and 

 losing slowly though surely, in spite of all my toil and 

 care, until my small means are so reduced that I hardly 

 now dare to look into the future. if I had only gone 

 away four years ago ! If I had gone then, I should 

 have been stronger in Means, stronger in Health, and, 

 above all, stronger in Will and determination. Alas ! 

 I feel that by and by I shall be as soft as a piece of 

 boiled fish ! " 



Though still engaged in finding fossil fishes for Hugh 

 Miller, and collecting botanical specimens from the 

 grasses, ferns, and mosses of Caithness, the thought was 

 constantly in his mind of how he could get away from 

 his losing business. At one time he thought of getting 

 admitted to the Coastguard service ; but he found that 

 he was too old for the position. But could he not yet 

 remove from Thurso, and set up as a baker elsewhere ? 

 Muckart, a village near Kinross, was mentioned to 

 him ; but he said, that " no man in his senses would 

 set his foot there." Then Bannockburn, near Stirling, 

 was mentioned : would that do ? " No," said he ; "I 

 have a dread of weaving places. "Weavers often suffei 

 great misery, and a stoppage of trade is clean ruin." 

 Another place was mentioned, where a business was for 

 sale. But he had not the means of buying or carrying 

 on the trade. And thus he was left at Thurso, to " try 

 again " ! 



