THE AMKRWAN BEE-KEEPER. 



MiirrJi 



about yo. -utjy, kimpkius, but dou't 

 come back ; dou't come back!" 



Conkling and Thurman. 



Senator Roscoe Coukling was once 

 addressing the senate in an impassioned 

 manner and seemed to direct bis re- 

 marks to iSeuator Tburman. At length 

 the latter got irritated. 



"Does the senator from New York," 

 he roared, "expect me to answer him 

 every time he turns to me?" 



For a moment Mr. Conkling hesitat- 

 ed, and everybody expected a terrific ex- 

 plosion. Then with an air of exquisite 

 courtesy he replied : 



"When I speak of the law, I turn to 

 the senator from Ohio as the Mussulman 

 turns toward Mecca. I turn to him as I 

 do to the English common law as the 

 world's most copious fountain of hu- 

 man jurisprudence." 



The usually decorous senate broke in- 

 to a storm of applause, and the Tbur- 

 man eye moistened a little. It is ever a 

 pleasure to be complimented, but to be 

 complimented as a lawyer by Roscoe 

 Conkling— that was praise indeed. The 

 two statesmen were the best of friends 

 and greatly enjoyed each other's society 

 •when "off duty." — Baltimore Ameri- 

 can. 



The Preacher Performed His Part. 



It has long been a matter of contro- 

 vereyhowfar the end justifies the means 

 in getting money for good purposes. 

 There are occasionally found people who 

 object to the extortion of a church fair 

 •where you get in for 25 cents and out 

 for $25, and who say that the rafle of a 

 charity bazaar differs from no other 

 gambling except that nobody but the 

 directors ever win the prize quilts. A 

 gambler from Ohio, who had made a 

 big fortune in a saloon and faro bank, 

 Bays that last winter he attended a col- 

 ored church in Florida where the 

 preacher announced that a special bless- 

 ing would be asked for all contributors. 

 One brother put in a dime. "De Lord 

 bless Brer Jones 1" exclaimed the preach- 

 er. "Brer Johnson, God bless you for 

 that quartah. ' ' When it came to the 

 gambler, he fished out a $20 bill. 

 "What name?" asked the almost breach- 

 less collector. "It doesn't matter. lam 

 a gambler from Ohio. " "Gamblahfrom 

 Ohio I" shouted the collector. The paa- 



tor rolled up his eyes and dropped on 

 his knees: "Twenty dollars from de 

 gamblah from Ohio ! May de good Lawd 

 prosper him in his business!" — New 

 Orleans Picayune. 



The Alaska Bunndary. 



Alaska was not much thought of at 

 the time of its purchase, and there is a 

 tradition that the money we paid for it 

 really reimbursed Russia for other good 

 offices of hers in our behalf. But now it 

 is seen to have been worth far more 

 than it cost. It is likely that we do not 

 know as yet anything like the full meas- 

 ure of its possibilities. It is worth re- 

 taining to the exlremest boundary. Brit- 

 ain knows something of its value, as 

 she knew that of the Columbia river 

 years ago. We should know enough 

 about boundary problems by this time 

 to defend our own without shrinking or 

 carelessness. 



It is not probable that the Alaska case 

 ever will come to arbitration. It will be 

 settled, like the Maine and Oregon 

 boundary disputes, by negotiation and a 

 treaty, and the United States will lose 

 no territory. — Portland Oregonian. 



The "Bad Man's" Sense of Humor. 



A young man from way down east 

 had gone to Denver armed with an old 

 fashioned Alien revolver — "pepper box" 

 that weapon was called in those days. 



In a gambling house one night he be- 

 came involved with a "bad man" in a 

 quarrel and drew forth his "pepper 

 bos." The "bad man," who was really 

 a tough citizen from the mountains, and 

 who had not the "remotest idea of fear, 

 and who was always armed with a pair 

 of big navies, threw up his hand in well 

 feigned dismay and said: 



"Heavens, man ! Yon ain't a-goin to 

 throw that at me, are you?" 



For the sake of his joke he spared the 

 young man's life, and to that one of the 

 wealthiest and most respected citizens 

 of Denver now owes the fact that he is 

 doing business in the western metropolis. 



He is a monument of that border 

 man's sense of humor. — Chicago Times- 

 Herald. 



A Witty Judge. 



The late Lord Bowen, besides being a 

 great judge, was also a great wit, and 

 many interesting bonmots of his are be- 

 ing recalled just now. On the occa sion 



