drown him. To be sure he may be able to pass it on 

 to the next neighbor and so escape you in that way, 

 but have a try at him; it will not cost you anything 

 and he may not be able to get rid of it. If you do 

 like your neighbor, you will probably consult with him 

 beforehand and the two of you will agre in good neigh- 

 borly fashion to dig the ditch between you so that it 

 will drown someone else whom neither of you like. It 

 might be possible to conceive of a friendship so exten- 

 sive that the water would be led clear away to a free 

 flowing stream without drowning anyone; but that is 

 a rather Utopian dream, and most of us pity a poor 

 nut who pins too much faith to Utopia. She's a bad 

 actor. 



But why depend on this goddess of dreams? There 

 are a few of our scientists, hand-picked ones to be sure, 

 who know absolutely that water runs downhill. Then 

 why not make use of that knowledge? I believe in 

 hiring experts myself. Why not prohibit a man (or 

 woman either, for that matter) from digging a ditch 

 without a permit from the state drainage commission- 

 er? This would, of course, presuppose a comprehen- 

 sive plan for state drainage. This is something that 

 does not exist at present, but might reasonably be con- 

 sidered as a prerequisite for any downhill, non-drown- 

 ing, local drainage project. 



Nor can this state plan be concocted in the state 

 capitol, even by the best draftsman in the world, with 

 the simple aid of a topographic map. They could draw 

 the skeleton of a ditch system, possibly determine the 

 proper size of the ditch, and might even get it run- 

 ning downhill all right, but, as I tried to explain above, 



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