FAES-NAMA 



CHAPTER I 



REASON FOR WRITING THE BOOK 



Let me acquaint the reader with a small portion of my private 

 history. 



Fortune had oppressed me and a great cloud of grief over- 

 shadowed my heart. I said to myself : " This world is a transient 

 one, and God alone knows how many days remain to me in it. 

 Why should I fruitlessly spend my life ; why recklessly waste my 

 time ? My wife and children — what are they but enemies ? In this 

 world none helps another in time of real need. My family will eat 

 what they can, and then forsake me, while trouble will fall on my 

 solitary head and I — I shall be alone with my grave." My mind 

 was filled with this gloom ; I ate not and I slept not. I sought 

 only release from my pain, and took ceaseless counsel with my own 

 soul ; but the knot of the diflBculty could not be untied, for no plan 

 came into my mind. In my despair I quitted my home and 

 wandered in the desert ; I shunned the abodes of men like a wild 

 beast. Nowhere could I find rest : I wandered and wandered 

 ceaselessly. 



For long I bore my house on my back, till one day, returning 

 to my senses, I said to my heart : " How long wilt thou 

 abhor life ? Abandon this futility and return to the dwellings 

 of men." In this new frame of mind I found myself in 

 Lucknow. I had two old friends in that city, Muhammad Bakhsh, 

 better known as Miyan Machchhu, and his younger brother Miyan 

 Qadir — (God bless them all their days, and keep them from grief ! 

 May they be rich in this world and rewarded in the next ! May 

 health and wealth ever be their portion !). They took me to their 

 home and laid their all before me; what was theirs was mine; 

 amongst us the words "mine" and "thine" ceased to exist. 

 I was overwhelmed by their kindness. 



One day my friends were turning over my writings and came 



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