AMERICAN BEE JOURNAL. 



535 



If my reasons for the theory that the 

 bees use their stings trowel- fashion are 

 deemed insufficient by Dr. Miller or any 

 one else, it is all right, I do not ask 

 them to accept it. The theory is quite 

 harmless, although Dr. Miller and Edi- 

 tor York affect to think it has done a lot 

 of mischief in Sunday schools and else- 

 where. Some time ago, Dr. Miller, I do 

 not remember when or where, conveyed 

 the idea that it had done Sabbath schol- 

 ars harm, and an editorial paragraph 

 joins with the Doctor in calling on me 

 " to acknowledge the corn like a man, 

 instead of permitting the theory to be 

 republished, to the evident detriment of 

 the more intelligent American bee-keep- 

 ers." All this is very absurd and ridicu- 

 lous. What surprises me most of all is 

 the fierceness and persistency of Dr. 

 Miller's onslaughts on me in regard to 

 this matter. They have been kept up 

 at intervals for several years. I have 

 not noticed them for a long time, re- 

 garding it as a case of " much ado about 

 nothing," and considering that the 

 cacccthes scribendi which has become a 

 chronic disease with him, must often 

 run him short of subjects. 



In the American Bee Jouknal, of 

 April 5th, Mr. G. W. Demaree awards 

 me the booby prize for having put forth 

 the most absurd and groundless theory 

 that has ever appeared in bee-literature. 

 Truly, I have been laden with honors 

 during my brief career as a bee-keeper ! 

 In 1872, I took the New York Bee- 

 Keepers' Magazine prize for the best 

 poem on the honey-bee ; and now, in 

 1894, I am awarded the palm for the 

 silliest theory in bee-literature ! Mr. 

 Demaree is a model experimenter, I 

 must say. He catches a bee by the 

 wings and provokes it to sting in order 

 to find out whether there is any side 

 motion to the stinger muscles! No; I 

 have not won the booby prize after all. I 

 resign it to Mr. D. 



But even this experiment is outdone 

 by the one designed to show " conclu- 

 sively" how formic acid gets into honey. 

 I am astonished that this experiment 

 was permitted to go into print, since it 

 is nothing less than a recipe for the 

 manufacture of sugar-honey. All that 

 is necessary is to evaporate some thin 

 sugar syrup over a strong colony of bees. 

 The "effluvium arising from the clus- 

 ter " will do the rest. Exeunt all the- 

 ories "about bees manufacturing honey 

 by means of their heads (glands) and 

 tails (stings). Bah!" Yes; let all the 

 sheep in the flock, and all the calves 

 in the herd, say " Bah !" 



Guelph, Ont. 



Transferrliig— Gusty Sclraeier's fay. 



Written Jor the American Bee Journal 



You vants to know vy I virst pegins 

 geepin dose pees ? Veil ! I tole you. 



Den yeers ago, me und Fritz gets mar- 

 rid, und mine fadder, he gif me von 

 kow, dree gees, sum shikens und a 

 scliwarm of pees in a parrel for dot. Dis 

 vas in the vail, und ve set de parrel in 

 der open voodshet pack of de keetchen. 

 Dare da schtayed dill scbpring ; und 

 den kooms out of dat parrel like den 

 •dousand. 



Von da bout May dime I goes ofer to 

 Hans Schtums, vot geeps pees. He und 

 his vife Katrina da show me hees pees. 

 Veil, I tole you mister ! ven I see dose 

 nice, vite leedle houses dot Hans had 

 vor hees pees to keep in, I shust vanted 

 mine pees in von doo. Den Hans he 

 show me der nice shtraight gomes, und 

 der leddle poxes doo put der honey in. 

 I shust say mit mineself, "Gusty, you 

 must pe a pee-man doo." Hans, he 

 show me how he good handle mit dose 

 pees, und dole me how I could shange 

 mine ofer into houses — hives, vot you 

 call dem ? 



Katrina she pring me some vine vire 

 und some leedle nails. Hans villed doo 

 hives mit vrames und my arms mit 

 bapers und books. For all dot I geef 

 him von goose, two shickens, und der 

 bromise off a leedle peeg bime-by. 



I vent home und read dose bapers, 

 und show dose tings to Fritz, und he tot 

 dot vas pooty nice. Den I shtudies und 

 reads dose bapers von veek maype, und 

 den I tinks I knows it all. Von ta, ven 

 Fritz vas va down in der fieldt, I got de 

 hives mit de frames und efferyting, all 

 reddy. 



Mine old dinship ball, I feel him mit 

 shticks und Are doo make a shmoke. 

 Den I gets der saw, und hammer, und 

 mine pig putcher knife, und puts dem 

 handy. I shtands und looks at dot par- 

 rel apout von minute, und den I vent 

 doo vork. 



Firs ting I took some shticks und 

 shtuck dem in der holes so de pees 

 gooden't podder, und I dakes oop de saw 

 und sawed of deem hoops mit der saw. 

 Effery ding vas lofely, und I dinks mit 

 myself, " Gusty, now aindt you shmardt? 

 You pe a pee-man alreaty yet." 



I bicked up der hammer und ax, und 

 bounded und bryed dill, shust so queek 

 like noddings, dot shtave gome off mit a 

 great pig biece of honey shteckin mit 

 him und — cracious Pedar ! I tole you 

 mister ! Den dousand million pees 



