186 REMINISCENCES OF SONEPORE. 



of Traffic Superintendents, Mr. Newcomen, with the dire threat 

 that all traffic would be suspended unless I was chucked. The 

 following are the appendices to the Station Master's report : 



Exhibit A. 

 Mighty Baboon. 



Please send my case of whisky. 



Exhibit B. 

 Son of a Cow Buffalo. 



Please send me my case of whisky. 



Exhibit C. 

 Mystic offspring of a post-pliocene protoplasm, 



Please forward me my case of whisky. 



Exhibit D. 

 Obtusest of parallelogrammatic Aryans, 



Please forward that van load of Neurasthenippo- 

 skelesterizo. 



Farewell my Baboo of the rotund seat. 

 The toffy one, like Venus with her " spretce injuria formae," 

 fired up at my supposed reflection on the good looks of the 

 T.S.R. Staff, and has worried the bosses into threatening 

 to " rub it in " under some section of a pestilent work entitled 

 "the Penal Code," the " it" being, I presume, the ullaged 

 oil used to light the stations. But I have been misunderstood 

 as if I had Gibbonsed orTrailled the Station Master. " Baboon" 

 is the English for Hanooman, that great Hindoo god. Now 

 you never feel insulted when I call you a little god, and Newky 

 showed no signs of displeasure when Miss but there I must 

 draw a veil over that scene. For addressing the Aryan as 

 " son of a cow buffalo," I have the authority of " AH Baba," 

 who said that the Lama told him that a virtuous cow hippopota- 

 mus by metempsychosis might, under unfavourable circum- 

 stances, become an undergraduate of the Calcutta University, 

 and that, when patent leather shoes and English supervened, 

 the thing was a Baboo. Besides, the cow is an object of yen era- 



