USING ONE'S EYES 



Mr. President, Members of this Association: 



It is certainly a great pleasure for me to be here this after- 

 noon in spite of the weather. I am going to take as my subject, 

 "Using One's Eyes." As I look at this audience and think of 

 my subject, I am reminded of the story of Colonel Clipsham's 

 calendar. 



You remember this society man, who was much in demand to 

 speak on various occasions, and one day his little niece Gertrude 

 happened into his study and began to play. In the course of 

 her play she went to his desk and on that desk there was a 

 calendar. There were two columns, one for the day of the 

 week, and the other for the day of the month, and under the 

 day of the week column, a space where one might record his 

 engagements. During her play she turned the screw of the day 

 of the week scroll, and as a result his engagements were mixed 

 for the coming seven days. 



Thus he went to speak to the carriage builders association, 

 and thought he was addressing the Chautauquan literary 

 circle. He praised his audience on account of their interest in 

 books, but did not say anything about varnish nor about the 

 hub of the universe, nor did he once mention Dr. Holmes's 

 One-Hoss Shay, which had been worked to death at their 

 celebrations. The result was, they received him with great 

 applause. 



The next night he went to speak to the local Grand Army 

 Post. He had nothing to say about Molly Stark, nor about the 

 Bird of Freedom, for he imagined that he was talking to the 

 graduates of the Western Reserve College, and complimented 

 them on their broad scholarship and intellectual ideals. The 

 Grand Army was very glad to greet him, and received him 

 with much enthusiasm. 



