WITH HIS FAMILY 



115 



of a kitten. But yet he knew and remembered the individu- 

 alities of my many cats, and would talk about the habits and 

 characters of the more remarkable ones years after they had 

 died. 



" Another characteristic of his treatment of his children 

 was his respect for their liberty, and for their personality. 

 Even as quite a girl, I remember rejoicing in this sense of 

 freedom. Our father and mother would not even wish to 

 know what we were doing or thinking unless we wished to 

 tell He always made us feel that we were each of us creat- 

 ures whose opinions and thoughts were valuable to him, so 

 that whatever there was best in us came out in the sunshine 

 of his presence. 



" I do not think his exaggerated sense of our good quali- 

 ties, intellectual or moral, made us conceited, as might perhaps 

 have been expected, but rather more humble and grateful to 

 him. The reason being no doubt that the influence of his 

 character, of his sincerity and greatness of nature, had a 

 much deeper and more lasting effect than any small exalta- 

 tion which his praises or admiration may have caused to our 

 vanity." 



As head of a household he was much loved and respected ; 

 he always spoke to servants with politeness, using the expres- 

 sion, "would you be so good," in asking for anything. He 

 was hardly ever angry with his servants ; it shows how seldom 

 this occurred, that when, as a small boy, I overheard a servant 

 being scolded, and my father speaking angrily, it impressed 

 me as an appalling circumstance, and I remember running up 

 stairs out of a general sense of awe. He did not trouble him- 

 self about the management of the garden, cows, &c. He 

 considered the horses so little his concern, that he used to ask 

 doubtfully whether he might have a horse and cart to send to 

 Keston for Drosera, or to the Westerham nurseries for plants, 

 or the like. 



As a host my father had a peculiar charm : the presence 

 of visitors excited him, and made him appear to his best 



