Some Gardeners I Have Known 149 



at 95 and the entire family is in dishabille. No wonder I 

 have had to resort at times to defenses against strangers, 

 and this is my decoy, used particularly when my guests 

 wear clean white gloves and natty little silk coats, and carry 

 a lorgnette. Recognizing enemies of my convenience they 

 generally come in squads I welcome them with great hos- 

 pitality, not, however, asking them to sit down. I make 

 a pretense of showing some new thing of interest about the 

 room, and suddenly say, "Let me show you something 

 in the garden," holding them in leash at the edge, then wheel 

 toward the aforesaid mountain view always conveniently at 

 hand, wait until the adjectives are expended, then turn back 

 to the lawn. There is nothing left to do; their carriage is ob- 

 viously waiting for them, and they are encouraged to mount 

 their chariot; they are down the lane before they realize that 

 they have inadvertently stepped upon my inclined plane 

 which gently bows an intruder down and out without hurting 

 the feelings of anybody. Pray do not make the mistake in 

 thinking that this device is used often. It is only when cir- 

 cumstances force the worm to turn, and never after three 

 o'clock in the afternoon. 



I have drifted from my subject, and return to the conserva- 

 tive gardener, who lives by tradition. She, it is, who preserves 

 a remnant of her grandmother's garden, who has a natural 

 antipathy toward all innovations as pernicious. She is an 

 archive of the past. Her lettuce is always eaten with sugar 

 and vinegar, never with a French dressing. Her culinary 

 heavens rest upon the two pillars of baked beans and brown 

 bread Saturday night, and Indian pudding in the middle of 

 the week. No one ever need stumble over her furniture in the 

 dark; for, from time immemorial, the chairs have been placed 

 just so. Yet dear and sweet and true is she in all her aspects 

 if a little rigid; for it is she who has retained for us the old- 



