LETTERS. 287 



TO HIS BROTHER NEVILLE. 



St John's, 19th December 1805. 

 Dn:AR Neville, 



I was sorry to receive your letter, desiring me to 

 defer my journey ; and I am sorry to be forced to tell 

 you the reason of my coming to town sooner than you 

 wish me. I have had an attack of my old nervous com- 

 plaint, and my spirits have been so wretchedly shattered, 

 that my surgeon says I shall never be well till I have 

 removed somewhere, where I can have society and amuse- 

 ment. It is a very distressing thing to be ill in college, 

 where you have no attendance, and very little society. 

 Mr Catton, my tutor, has prevailed upon me, by pressing 

 wishes, to go into the hall to be examined with the men 

 of my year. I have gone through two examinations, 

 and I have one to come ; after that is over, he told me 

 I had better go to my friends directly, and relieve myself 

 with complete relaxation from study. Under these cir- 

 cumstances, the object of my journey to London will be 

 answered, by the mere residence in my aunt's family, 

 and by a cessation from reading. While I am here, I 

 am wretched ; I cannot read, the slightest application 

 makes me faint ; I have very little society, and that is 

 quite a force upon my friends. I am determined, there- 

 fore, to leave this place on Saturday morning, and you 

 may rest satisfied that the purpose of my journey will 

 be fully accomplished by the prattle of my aunt's little 

 ones, and her care. I am not an invalid, since I have 

 no sickness or aihuent, but I am weak and low-spirited, 

 and unable to read. The last is the greatest calamity I 

 can experience of a worldly nature. My mind preys 

 upon itself. Had it not been for Lecson, of Clare Hall, 

 I could not have gone through this week. I have been 

 examined twice, and almost without looking over the 

 subjects, and I have given satisfaction, but I am obliged 

 to be kept up by strong medicines to endure this exer- 

 tion, which is very great. 



