392 



NEW ENGLAND FARMER, 



JT'NE 13, 1838. 



3SSSS-©I§I£>I£.^''af'^8 



For the N. E. Farmer. 

 THE LUMPKIN LOT. 



Guij Lumpkin was a loggcrliead ; 



Yet (iiiy ha'l Bflf-csteeni ; 

 He rliallengcfl all to mow, or chop. 



Or thresh, or drive a team. 



One Captain Sly, ho look him up, 



And bet that he would beat him 

 In mowing a twelve-acre piece. 



If Lumpkin dared to meet him. 



Up bristled Guy, " bold as a sheep !" 

 " Come Sly, " said he, " here's go it ; 



I ralhei gucsH you'll rue the day 

 You tried with raeto mow it." 



Then at the centre of the field 



The roguish Sly set in. 

 And Lumpkin, following at his heels, 



Slashed on through thick and thin. 



So, round and round they swung their scythes. 



And laid the meadow low ; 

 And many a rustic left his work. 



To see the braggarts mow. 



They drove ahead right lustily ; 



Thev snuffed, and lilowed.and sweat ; 

 And, for a while it doubtful seemed 



Who woulil obtain the bet. 



Tool- Lumpkin, not a Newton born. 



The difference did not see 

 Belwixt the greater and the less 



Of the periphery. 



The witless clown began to loll, 

 And thought the deuce was in 't ; 



" By gol," said he, " in my born days, 

 I never had such a stint !" 



Then some one whispered in his ear; 



Guy stopt, and gazed around ; — 

 " O, blazes take ye, Sly !" he cried, 



" I'm mowing loo much ground !" 



The joke was seen ;— the trial ceased ;— 



The parties left the spot ; 

 But yet this field has ever since 



Been call'd— the Lumpkin Lot. 



AGRICOLA. 



THE CONTRAST. 



Tlio tistonisliing |iower of lieP'ditiiry opinions, 

 niul of im|ii'('Ssioii 

 nueiiiptfiil to btt 



loj^tK', t'llI'l'OSf' 



terest, i 



i-Hpeivnil itr early ediiciition, is 

 illtistriilinl, i\v the following' dia- 

 to have orciiireil i>i an evening 

 r6MVfrs;itiiin, lielwcim tlif Cannef of the licre- 

 tVitiiry srliool, luid liis son, on the hitter's rcUirn 

 from Hi'hool, whet" lie had studied, with some in- 

 tlie luliiciples of siiientific farming. 



Lansingbcrch. 

 Pnlkpr. — Well, John, since yon are hocominga 

 .schohir, I sniiposi: yon have qnite outgrown the 

 ihoiighls of lircoiniug a farmer ? 



Son. No, father, the efTeot is ipiite the con- 



trarv. 1 l'!»ve been paying considerable attention 

 to tiio study of agricidtiire; and I assure you 1 

 have found it a most delightful suhjeet. 



p. From the 



nuiuher of books and foolish 

 have hroiiglit 



newspapers, all ahoul (iirmmg, you 



home, you are iu u fair way to run ciuzy and turn 



book farmer — why son I would sooner see you 



enaagcd iu eatehing grasshoppers. 



5. Then, I sup|iose father, you consider farm- 

 ing is not susceptible of any improvements. 



F. lin|ii-ovemenis, why what improvements 

 do you want, John'! Have 1 not been a farmer all 

 the days of my life — and a good farmer? and 

 were tiot my lather and grandfather good farm- 

 ers, brought lip to it ? and now 1 have been send- 

 ing you to school, and on your return lioine, you 

 have commenced leaching me how to farm. No 



no — John, that won't do — lam too old to 



liegin to learn my trade from hooks, written by a 

 parcel of lazy fellows, who never hoed a bill of 

 corn in their lives. 



S. Thiui, I suppose you will plant corn on the 

 same old fiehl behind the barn where you have 

 always planted it, and feed the same breed of long 

 snouted razor backed'hogs. 



F. Yes, John, 1 have hoed corn in that old 

 fiehl many a day by the- side of your grandfather ; 

 and it is good enough for me yet; and the pork 

 of ttiy old breed of hogs brought me over a hiio- 

 (Ired dollars last winter, and I have no doubt, 

 they will bring me as much this winter coming: 

 anci if you intend to be a farmer, ami are wise 

 you will follow my example, and not be led into 

 the wild goose chase of book farming. 



S. Well, father, I am not disposed to ques- 

 tion your claim to the title of a good farmer ; and 

 ] am proud of being descendeil from ancestors of 

 that most ancient and most honorable calling ; 

 but should 1 arrive at the honor of pursuing it on 

 my own account, I shall feel additional jiriile in 

 meriting the ap|)ellation of a hook farmer. If I 

 can succeed in raising sixty bushels of corn from 

 an acre with the same, or less labor than it cost 

 you to raise thirty ; and if 1 can obtain a breed 

 of logs which are not more than half legs, ears 

 and snout; and which will not, like Pharoah's 

 lean kine, cost more than their value, I shall not 

 consider that I disgrace my worthy ancestors by 

 so doing. 



F. Ah John, when you are of age you will j 

 of course act for yourself, and I hope, by that 

 time yon will have more sense than to believe 

 your sixty bushel stories, and hogs fatted upon 

 moonshine. 1 have as good corn on the old fami- 

 ly corn lot as any of my neighbors, and I think 

 ihirty bushels n pretty good crop. For my part, 

 1 dont think best to believe half the lies people 

 tell. 



S. 1 have no wish, fiither, to believe lies; hut 

 I think I could give you most saiisfaclory proof 

 that more than a hundred bushels of corn have 

 been raised from an ;u-re, in ii great number of 

 instances — 



F. Why John — I would not believe so fool- 

 ish a .story, if I told it myself. But I see 1 have 

 sent you to school to make a fool of you. 1 hope, 

 however, you will outgrow it when you get more 

 discretion. 



S. 1 hope sir, I shall improve in discretion, 

 hut I am very sure discrcticui will never influence 

 me against being a book farmer. 



F. A book farmer ! — why my .son, 1 am tired 

 of such folly — have not I always beiui consid- 

 ered a good resfieetahle I'armer? Are not my 

 crops always planted in si'ason and tended and 

 gathered in good order? What belter can you do 

 in farming, than to follow my example. 



S. Your example, fither, as far as industry 

 and attention to business go, are perfectly satis- 



factory, and I shall be proud to follow it. But 

 you ■will cxcn.se me when I tell you that book 



farming teaches me some improvements in the 

 system of managing which I think are too im- 

 portant to be neglected. It teaches me that plants 

 require food as well as animals; and that tfie » 

 ground which supplies that requires to be replen- 

 ished from lime to tune with the means — it 

 teaches me that if the manure which has been ac- 

 cumulating by the side of your barn ever since 

 my remembrance, anil is now rotting the cover- 

 ing, were s|uead upon your corn field, it would, 

 at least, double yniir crop; that by changing 

 crops the value of your land would be doubled. 

 I have learned, by books, as well as by my own 

 observation, that as greal improvements may be 

 made, in the breeds of animals as in the choice 

 and cultivation of vegetables, especially in the 

 breed of hogs. 



F. Why, in the name of common sense, what 

 improvement would yiui have in the breed of 

 hogs? My hugs last fall weighed from three to 

 four hundred — do you want anytliing better than 

 that? . 



S. Why, sir, the corn which fatted each of 

 your hogs, to that weight, would have been abun- 

 dantly suflicient for three of the Berkshire breed, 

 of the same weights, and that which feeds your 

 store hogs, with bodies as lank as greyhounds, and 

 having legs as if you were breeding them for racing 

 and leaping fences, woiihl double the nnndier of 

 any of the improved breeds with short legs and 

 ears, so fat that their bellies would drag upon the 

 ground. 



By the way, father, let me show yon a sketch I 

 made at Hoosic falls the other day — a fat hog. of 

 the Berkshire breed, was turning to get an ear of 

 corn which lay lietwccn it and the fence, when a 

 real racer of your favorite breed, which was six 

 or seven yards ofl^, seeing the corn, and urged no 

 doubt by Ijis ever craving appetite, making wliat 

 a Scotchman would call a hop, step and lenp, 

 jumped clean over him, and got the corn. — The 

 Cultivator. 



An Irish piiest, on proceeding to the church 

 one Sunday morning, through the burial ground, 

 observed several sprightly girls seated on a tomb- 

 stone, and wishing to be jocular with them, asked 

 what they were (ioing there? "Nothing at all, 

 phize your rivirenre," was the reply of one of 

 them. " Nothing !" said he. " What is nolliing ?" 

 "Shut your eyes, your rivirence," retorted the 

 girl, " and you'll see it." — London paper. 



A mnn of enlarfrcd ideas. — "Mister, where is 

 your house ?" asked a curious traveller of a halt 

 h(u-se and half alligator, squatter. " House, eh ! do 

 you think I'm one of them sort? stranger! 1 

 sleep in the Government piu-chase ; I eats raw 

 hear anil bufl'alo, and drinks out of the Missis- 

 sippi !" 



T 



le United Stales Gazette contains the follow- 

 ing queer advertisement : — " A legitimate gentle- 

 man wishing to retire, would be willing to become 

 the sou of a persou having no male offspring." 



Friutra btj Viilllf, netiHttt .V t'hiaholm, 



n SCHCIOL BTREIT IHISTON, 



0KDEK3 rOB PBINTINU KKCKIVKD BV THE POBLISHKB* 



