72 



NEW ENGLAND FARMER. 



SEPTEMBER 11, 1833. 



MISCELLANY. 



For the New England Farmer. 



TO 



Oh, say nol so — ( would not take 



A crown, if that must be 

 A reason why mv heart should break 



The vows it made to thee. 



While virtue, with intent benign, 

 Makes human weal Iter care. 



And in 1 1 1 v bosom finds a shrine, 

 My In-art shall worship there. 



Nor time, nor circumstance, nor aught 



Of fate's unkind decree, 

 Shall bring " oblivion of a thought" — 



One kindly thought of thee. 



Oh ! say not so — this world would be, 



A waste — if that were true, 

 A wilderness — at least to me j 



Not so, perhaps to you; 



For thousand sources of delight, 



And other (lowers as sweet, 

 Ope to your yet unwearied sight, 



And spring beneath your feet. 



■ Oh, say not so not always dies 



The stem, when fade the flowers. — 

 A brighter spring and sunnier skies, 



Where never cloud was known to rise, 

 Shall wake to life this bud of ours. 



The following elegant Impromptu was laid on the table of 

 the Mass. Hor. Society, at a recent exhibition of Fruits Flow- 

 ers, &.c. We understand tharit was written by Mr. — Williams 

 of Cambridge, who, though an aged, is it seems not an unsuc- 

 cessful suitor of the Muse. 



When Ceres with Pomona join 

 Their bounty with the cluster'd vine, 

 The velvet Peach and melting Pear 

 Contributes each a liberal share; 

 A in I all the minor fruits present 

 Their most delicious complement, 

 It may be ask'd, with such a store, 

 Can Epicureans wish for more ? 



THE JEW JEWD. 



It was observed that a certain covetous rich 

 man never invited any person to dine with him. 

 ' I will lay a wager,' paid a wag, ' that I get an in- 

 vitation from liiin.' The wager being accepted, 

 he goes the next day to the rich man's house about 

 the time he was known to sit down to dinner, and 

 tells the servant that he must speak with his mas- 

 ter immediately, for that he could save him a 

 thousand pounds. 'Sir,' says the servant to his 

 master, ' here is a man in a great hurry to speak 

 with you, who says he can save you a thousand 



pounds.' Out comes the master, '■ what is 



that you say sir, that you can save me a thousand 

 pounds?' 'Yes sir, I can, but I see you are at 

 dinner; I will go myself and dine, and call again.' 

 ' O pray, sir, take dinner with me.' ' Sir, I shall be 

 troublesome.' ' Not at all. Not at all.' The 

 invitation was accepted. As soon as dinner was 

 over, anil the family retired, ' well sir,' says the 

 man of the house, ' now to our business. Pray let 

 me know how I am to save his thousand'potinds ?' 

 ' Why sir,' said the other, ' I hear you have a 

 daughter to dispose of in marriage.' ' I have.' 

 ' And you intend to portion her with ten thousand 

 pounds.' ' I do so.' ' Then sir, let me have her 

 with nine thousand.' The master of the house 

 rose in a passion and turned him out of doors. 



It was a fine sentence of Cobbett, a pearl 

 among pebbles, in which he asserts that he has 

 never suffered any thing, although often disgraced 

 in the eyes of the world, condemned by the tri- 

 bunals of his country, fined by his king, impris- 



i <l by his courts, and every way degraded in his 



relations with society — because he had felt no 

 trouble at borne, and in his family — because his 

 wife loved, and assiduously cherished and com- 

 forted him, his children revered, his domestics re- 

 spected and served him faithfully. — Salem Gaz. 



Paternal Solicitude. A young man, to whom 

 Corneille was to give his daughter in marriage, be- 

 ing unable, from the state of his affairs, to carry the 

 match into effect, came one morning to her fath- 

 er's house to inform him of it. He penetrated as 

 far as the poet's study, for the purpose of explain- 

 ing the motives of his conduct. "Well sir," re- 

 plied Corneille, "could you not have communica- 

 ted all this to my wife without interrupting me? 

 Ascend into her chamber, for I understand noth- 

 ing about such affairs." 



Lord Byron. It may not he generally known 

 that the present Lord Chancellor Brougham is the 

 real author of the famous article in the Edinburgh 

 Review, on Byron's Juvenile production, " Hours 

 of Idleness," for which Jeffrey was so severely tak- 

 en to task in the satire, "English Bards and 

 Scotch Reviewers." We have this fact from an 

 authority on which we can place the utmost reli- 

 ance. — Edinburgh Observer. 



A Deacon corrected by a Drunkard. We have 

 noticed in some of our exchange papers, an anec- 

 dote of which the following is the substance. 

 Names are omitted, because we have not the copy 

 at band. An old toper who was sensible of the ill 

 consequences to himself and others of too great fa- 

 cilities for obtaining rum, held out by those whose 

 example ought to be good, called one evening on 



a rum merchant, Dea. B , to get his bottle 



replenished. After the Deacon had drawn the liq- 

 uor, and while he was pocketing the pay, — "Dea- 

 con, — (said the toper,) what do you suppose I saw 

 in imagination while you were drawing the rum ?" 

 — "I don't know (said the other,) what was it ?" 

 "Why, (said the toper,) I thought I saw the dev- 

 il leaning over you, and as he grinned a ghastly 

 smile, exclaimed, ' That's the Deacon for me! ' " 



The following is said to be the origin of nine 

 tailors making a man: — A beggar stopped at a 

 shop where nine tailors were at work, and craved 

 charity of them; each contributed his mite, and 

 presented the beggar with the sum total. The 

 beggar, thanking them for their kindness, said they 

 had made a man of him. 



How often have I told you, that fools do more 

 mischief in the world than villians. A villain is 

 generally possessed of sense, and does not deal in 

 defamation, unless he can thereby attain some end. 

 But a fool is continually prating. — I merely go out 

 of a rascal's road, but I conceal myself front a 

 blockhead. — Kotzebue's Happy -Family. 



POPULAR FALLACIES. 



There is a wonderful vigor in a popular falla- 

 cy. When the world has once got hold of a lie, 

 it is astonishing how hard it is to get it out of the 

 world. You beat it about the head till it seems 



to have given up the ghost; and lo ! the next day 

 it is as healthy as ever again. The best example 

 of the vitality of a fine saying which has the ad- 

 vantage of being a fallacy, is in the overhaekneyed 

 piece of nonsense attributed to Archimedes, viz: 

 " that he could move the earth, if he had any 

 place at a distance from it to fix a prop for his lev- 

 er." Your excellency knows that this is one of 

 the standard allusions, one of the necessary stock 

 in trade, for all orators, poets and newspaper 

 writers ; and persons, whenever they meet with it, 

 take Archimedes for an extraordinary great man, 

 ami cry, "Lord, how wonderful!" Now, if 

 Archimedes had found his place, his prop and his 

 lever, and if he could have moved with the swift- 

 ness of a cannon ball, 480 miles every hour, it 

 would have taken him just 44,963,540,000,000 

 years to have raised the earth one inch ! And yet 

 people will go on quoting absurdity as gospel — 

 wondering at the wisdom of Archimedes. — Eng- 

 land and the English. 



RUSSIA DIAPERS, at S3 a Piece. 



ELIAB STONE BREWER has just received 1000 pairs 

 Russia Diaper 1-2 ell. Selected in Russia by Win. Ropes, 

 Esq. expressly for the reiail trade of Boston, winch are offered 

 lor sale lor cash only, at 414 Washington Street. a 20 



PETTICOAT ROBES, at 3s. 



ELIAB STONE BREWER has just received .500 three 

 breadth Petticoat Robes for 3s. For cash only at 414 Wash- 

 ington St. a 20 



BUCKTHORNS. 



10,000 Buckthorns of thrifty growth, from two to three feet 

 high, for sale' — apply at this othce. aug 14 



HEARTH RUGS. 



THE Subscriber has received 12 bales splendid American 

 Hearth Rugs, Manufactured at the Tarriffville Factory, ex- 

 pressly lor the subscriber, who offers them at a rale as much 

 below the English prices, as they are superior in patterns and 

 quality. 



Persons wishing Rugs to match any carpet, will find desira- 

 ble patterns by calling on the subscriber, and can have manu- 

 factured tor them at short notice any variety of patterns they 

 can wisji, by leaving them at 114 Washington street. 



sepl4 3t ELIAB STONE BREWER. 



BROOKS' PATENT SILK SPINNER. 



THE public attention is invited lo this machine. It is adapt- 

 ed to domestic use, is simple in its construction, occupies a 

 small space, and may lie used lo advantage by women and 

 children. This machine may be obtained by applying to T. 

 It. NEWELL,- at the Agricultural Warehouse, No. 52 North 

 Market slreel, Boston; or to the Patentee, ADAM BROOKS. 



Scituate, July 22, 1833. 



THE NEW ENGLAND FARMER 



Is published every Wednesday Evening, at $3 per annum, 

 payable at the end of the year — but those who pay within 

 sixty days from the time ot subscribing, are entitled to a deduc- 

 tion of fifty cents. 



Qjp No paper will be sent to a distance without payment 

 being made in advance. 



AGENTS. 

 New York — G. Thorburn & Sons, G7 Liberty-street. 

 Albany — Wm. Thorburn, 317 Market-street. 

 Philadelphia— T). & C. Landreth, 85 Chesnut-street. 

 Baltimore — 1. I. Hitchcock, Publisher of American Farmer. 

 ' 'incinnati — S. C. Parkhcrst, 23 Lower Market-street. 

 Flushing, N. Y.— Wm. Prince & Sons, Prop. Lin.Bot.Gar. 

 Middlibury, 17. — Wight Chapman. Merchant. 

 Hartford — Goodwin & Co. Booksellers. 

 Springfield, tils. — E. Edwards, Merchant. 

 Newburyport — Ebe.nf.zer Stedman. Bookseller. 

 1'ortsmoulh, N. H. — J. W. Foster, Bookseller. 

 Portland, Me. — Colman, Holden & Co. Booksellers. 

 Atigvsta, Me. — Wm. Mann. Druggist. 



Halifax, N. S.— P. .1. Holland, Esq. Editor of Recorder. 

 Montreal, L. C. — Geo. Bent. 

 St. Louis — Geo. Holton. 



Printed for Geo. C. Barrett by Foed & Damrell 

 whoexecute every description of Book and Fancy Print- 

 ing in good style, and with promptness. Orders for print 

 intj may be left with Geo. C. Barrett, at the Agricul 

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