200 



NEW ENGLAND FARMER. 



January l, i«3*. 



MISCELLANY. 



NEW YEAR'S ADDRESS 



Of Ihe Currier of the jVew England Farmer to his 

 Friends an I Patrons. 



Grandfather Time, the only sage 

 Who ev'n in this enhghten'd age 

 Has really realiz'd the notion 

 Of practical perpetual motion, 

 Has brought your Carrier once more 

 Your Honor's Eminence before 

 With cap in hand, and that humility, 

 Which caps the climax of civility, 

 To wish your wishes may be gratified, 

 And hopes of happiness be ratified. 



The year which recently has sped 

 Was prodigal in bounties shed, 

 lias blessed our basket and our store 

 Till avarice could claim no more. 

 Gcod Mother Eartli has given profuse- 

 Ly every thing she could produce. — 

 Has yielded all she could, which can 

 Promote the happiness of Man. 

 And if our hearts do not o'erflow 

 Willi gratitude we ought, I trow, 

 To be hereafter doom'd to dwell 

 In tangled dell or gloomy cell, 

 And not allow 'd a common share 

 Of food and raiment, light and air. 



Some folks, who call themselves our betters, 

 Are, notwithstanding, much our debtors, 

 Owe us a sum too big for counting, 

 As large as say Wachusett mountain — 

 As many eagles three times told, 

 As Massachusetts bay would hold, 

 Thrown in and spread from strand to strand, 

 Till fill'd up level with the land : — 

 'Twould take, I take it what would come 

 To something near th' enormous sum, 

 (The largest ever heard of yet,) 

 Which would pay off Great Britain's debt; 

 Or product of both Indies, was it 

 Applied to make our said deposit. 



We fear your honor will surmise 

 That these our facts in fact are lies } 

 But stop and hear our statement through, 

 We'll eat our words or prove them true. 

 Please to take into computation, 

 What mankind owe' to cultivation, 

 And realize that We the Tillers 

 Compose the social fabric's pillars, 

 Without our aid the world would be 

 A miserable menagerie, 

 A boundless Wilderness of Sin, 

 And human life not worth a pin, 

 The wildest beast that ever ran 

 Would be the brutal biped Man ; — 

 The fine and useful arts would be, 

 (As Yankees phrase it,) " up a tree." 

 Where Genius, like Minerva's Owl, 

 Perches forlorn, — grim gaunt wolves howl, 

 And bears and panthers throng the copse 

 Ready to catch him when he drops ■. 

 A more tremendous situation 

 Ne'er cross'd a bard's imagination, 

 But something like it marks the strife, 

 'Twixt civilized and savage life, 

 An*l something worse is realized 

 Where culture is not known and priz'd — 

 Where neither hands, nor heads nor hearts 

 Are sway'd by sciences and arts. 



Did we not keep up cultivation, 

 Down-deiry-down would go the Nation, 

 The pert might prate, the proud parade, 

 But all must starve without our aid. 

 Without the Cultivator's art 

 Wild beasts would throng the bustling mart 

 Our rich men's mansions would be lairs 

 For raccoons, woodchucks, wild-cats, bears. — 

 But beauty's domicile must be 

 A sullen cave, or hollow tree ; 

 Her best apparel made of leaves, 

 (The counterpart of Madam Eve's 

 Without two bushel bags for sleeves,) 

 Rough becchen withes and thorns must tether 

 And gum and bird-lime glue together, 



Some limpid rivulet for tracing 

 The semblance of her lovely face in 

 Must serve the uncultivated lass 

 For basin, bath, and looking glass. 

 Assist in making such displays 

 As take in dandies now-a-daj-s. 

 Ah ! Ladies ! Ladies, ah ! 'tis true, 

 Such might have been the case with you, 

 Did not hard-handed cultivators 

 Improve our habits, mend our natures. 

 And education higher plaee 

 The standard of the human race.' 



The famous Mr. Edmund Burke 

 Has said in substance, some men's work 

 Is worth too much for valuation, 

 That money yields no compensation : — 

 For, some displays of human powers, 

 (To wit some head work, such as ours) 

 Admit of no equivalent given. 

 For cash is trash, but mind is Heaven. 

 Then, if this globe itself were tender'd 

 It would not pay for service render'd, 

 In which your Honor's bounty's suitor 

 Has been an humble coadjutor. 

 We, notwithstanding would be willing 

 To take a quarter, or a shilling, 

 The smallest trifle would be priz'd, 

 Which shows our claims are recogniz'd. 

 A pistareen for instance, may 

 Send us rejoicing on our way, 

 With which you can have no objection 

 To clench your claims to our affection, 

 And we'll obey, as you exhibit them, 

 Your orders then, henceforth ad libitum. 



AN EPITOME OP THE WORLD. 



Bulwer, in his last work, " England and the 

 English," tells the following anecdote: 



"A Russian of my acquaintance visited England 

 with a small portmanteau, ahout two years ago. 

 Good heavens ! how he ahused us ! never was so 

 rude, cruel and barbaric a people ! I saw him a 

 few months since, having paid us a second visit ; 

 he was in raptures with all he saw ; never was a 

 people so improved ; his table was covered with 

 cards — how hospitable we were ! The master of 

 the hotel had displaced an English family to ac- 

 commodate him ; what refined consideration for a 

 stranger ! Whence arose the difference of the 

 Russian's estimate of us? His uncle was dead — 

 he had come into n great property. In neither 

 case had our good people looked at the foreigner ; 

 they had looked the first time at the small port- 

 manteau, and the second time at the three car- 

 riages and four." 



to pass through his mouth — u wagon load of to- 

 bacco, and ten wheelbarrows heaped up with quids, 

 designed for an equally intimate association with 

 his lips; how would the prospect affect him ? And 

 if the delicate young lady who is to be the part- 

 ner of his life could see the same, how enviable 

 would be her emotions ?" 



QUIDS. 



The following elegant calculations from the 

 Charleston Observer, are for the especial benefit of 

 tobacco-chewers. A few months ago we were told 

 of an Anti-Matrimonial Society, formed by the 

 young ladies of this town ; if they would establish 

 an Ami - marrying-a-Tobacco-Chewing-Husband- 

 Society, there would be more in it. 



Portland Courier. 



" Allow that a young man, who is a confirmed 

 tobacco-chewer, may live twenty-five years. In 

 each day there will issue from his mouth half a 

 pint of fluid too nauseously disgusting to describe. 

 In twenty-five years this will amount to five hun- 

 dred and fifty gallons, or more than four hogs- 

 heads of this detestable mass. In the same time, 

 allowing him only two ounces a day, he will roll 

 as a sweet morsel under his tongue half a ton of 

 the hateful weed, which will sicken u dog or kill 

 a horse, forming a heap of the size of a hay-stack. 

 Then his rejected quids would form a still larger 

 pile. Now if such a young man could see ten 

 half hogsheads full of abominable filth, destined 



AMERICAN HEARTH RUGS. 



JUST received at -114 Washington street, a fresh snpply of 

 Hearth Rugs, from the TaritTville Factory, manufactured ex- 

 pressly for die subscriber — they are superior in beauty and fab- 

 ric to«ny imported. E. S BREWER. 



N. B. E. S. B. will receive orders to manufacture Rugs to 

 match any carpet. iseop'ijl nov'23 



23,000 YARDS COTTON FRINGE. 



JUST received from Philadelphia, and for sale by EL1AB 

 STONE BREWER, No. 41 l.Wasliington street. 



tf *oel3I 



■ CASH STORE. 



THE subscriber oflars for sale a Jnrg_e stock of English and" 

 American Goods at reduced juices, among which are 

 Bales Black Bombazetlc of good quality, at 12A, cts. par yard. 

 " Green u " " *' " " " 



" Blue and Brown Camblets'of good quality, at 12£ cents, 

 " Scotch Plaids, " " " " 



•' English, Sup. &. fine 6-4 Merino from 3s. to 8*. per vard. 

 " French " ■' " " ■' #1 to g2 " 



In addition to the above, the subscriber offers a more exten- 

 sive stock of Woollen, Linen and Cotton Goods, than can be 

 had at any other Store in the City, at prices proporlionably 

 low to those above named. 



E. S. BREWER, 414 Washington Street. 



NEW ENGLAND SEED STORE, 

 AND HORTICULTURAL, REPOSITORY. 



THE Subscriber having made enlargements in the business 

 of the above Establishment, is now enabled to furnish Traders 

 and others with 



GARDEN, GRASS AND FLOWER SEEDS, 

 upon very favorable terms, and of the growth ot 1833; and the 

 Garden Seeds icarranled of the best quality. 



The greatest care and attention has been bestowed upon the 

 growing ami saving of Seeds, and none will be sold at this 

 establishment excepting those raised expressly for it, aud by 

 experienced seedsmen ; and those kinds imported which cannot 

 he raised to perfection in this country : these are from the best 

 houses in Europe, and may be relied upon as genuine. 



It is earnestly requested whenever there are any failures 

 hereafter, they should be represented to the Subscriber ; not 

 that it is possible to obviate unfavorable seasons and circum- 

 stances, but that satisfaction may be rendered and perfection 

 approximated. 



Boxes of Garden Seeds, neatly papered up in packages for 

 retailing; and dealers supplied at a large discount. 



GRASS SEEDS, wholesale and retail, at as low prices as 

 can be bought in Boston, as arrangements have now been made 

 to obtain the best and purest seed. 



[LfCatalogues sent gratis to applicants, and Orders solicited 

 early, as belter justice can be done in the execution. 



N. E. Seed Store, connected with the N. E. Farmer Oftce, 

 No. 51 4-52 North Market-str, GEORGE C. BARRETT. 



THE NEW ENGLAND PARMER 



Is published every Wednesday Evening, at #3 per annum, 

 pavable at the end of the year — but those who pay within 

 sixty days from the lime of subscribing, are eniillcdlo a detec- 

 tion of fifty cents. 



Q^f* No paper will be sent to a distance without payment 

 being made in advance. 



AGENTS. 

 New York — G. Thorburn & Sons, 67 Liberty-street. 

 Albany — Win. Thorburn, 347 Market-street. 

 Philadelphia — I). &. C. Landreth,85 Chesnut-strcet. 

 Baltimore — 1. 1. Hitchcock, Publisher of American Farmer. 

 Cincinnati — S. C. Parkhurst, 23 Lower Market-street. 

 Flushing, N. Y. — Wti. Prince <fc Sons, Prop. Lin.Bol.ti». 

 Middlebury, Vt. — Wight Chapman, Merchant. 

 Hartford — Goodwin &. Co. Booksellers. 

 Newbunrport — Ebene/.er Stedman, Bookseller. 

 Portsmouth, N. 11. — J. W. Foster, Bookseller. 

 Portland, Me. — Colman, Holden & Co. Booksellere. 

 Bangor, Me. — Wm. Mann, Druggist. 



Halifax, N. 8. — P.J. Holland, Esq. Editor of Kceuider. 

 Montreal, L. C. — Geo. Bent. 

 St. Louis — Geo. Hoi, ton. 



Printed for Geo. C. Barrett by Ford & Dahrerl 

 who execute every description of Hook vnd Fancy Print- 

 ing in good style, and with promptness. Orders for prim- 

 ing may be left with Geo. C. Barrett, at the Agrienf 

 tural Warehouse, No. 52, North Market Street. 



