293 



NEW ENGLAND FARMER, 



JUKE 19, 1S33. 



MISCELLANY. 



Frmn the Liverpool Mercunj. 

 (0°We copy the following from a mamiscripl some eight or 

 len years old.' Whether it has ever been published, we know 

 not. It was commnnkated. though certainly not written. 

 A PAIN IN THE BREAST. 

 As sil-enl one evening I sat by the fire, 

 My countenance show'd me to be much distrcss'd, 

 The cause was soon asked by my Mother and Sire — 

 It straightway responded a pain in inij breast. 



My mother, aliirmed, cast her knitting aside, 

 And began to refli^ct on the remedy best; 

 Her various prescriptions in order were tried, 

 But they had no effect on the — pain in my breast. 

 Next, father call'd in a physician of skill. 

 And a hope for relieving me soon was expressed ; 

 But in spite of his medical powers and will. 

 He could not. diminish the pain in my breast. 



.It length an old lady proverbially wise, 

 Ilecame by the happiest of chances our gliest; 

 One day after gazing some time at my eyes 

 She inquired when I first felt the pain in my breast ? 



T replied, that one evening a visit I paid. 

 To a nymph'in whose presence all mortals seem'd blest, 

 And that from my parting, that lime, with the maid, 

 I had felt more or less ol the pain in my breast. 

 Anrl I added, that oft as we chanced to meet. 

 My bosom, her smiles of all pains dispossessed j 

 And \vhcneVr I withdrew from her aspect so sweet, 

 I felt a return of the paiji in my breast. 



**' Indeed" said she smiling — '' then thus I advise. 

 Straight the heart, and the hand, of the fair one request;" 

 I obcy'd — 1 was favored — and praised be the skies, 

 \ never since fell any pain in the breast. 



From the Detroit Courier. 

 Mf.ssrs. Editors, — By insertuig the following you nill 

 obligo " a constant reader." 



[from the ITALIAN OF METASTASIC] 



If every one's internal care 



Were written on his brow, 

 How many would our pity share, 



Who raise our envy now. 



The fatal secret, when levealed. 



Of every aching breast 

 Would prove that only while concealed 



Their lot ajipears the best. 



PROVERBS. 



A hog upon trust grunts till lie is pttid for. 



A spur in tlic head is worth two in tlie hceh 



A civil denial is hetter than a rude grunt. 



Au old dog can't alter his way of barking. 



A thread bare coat is armor proof against a 

 liighwayinan. 



A wager is a fool's argtiment. 



Better wear out shoes, than siieets. 



Beauty is potent, but money is omnipotent. 



He that falls into the dirt, the longer he lies, the 

 dirtier he is. 



He who says what he likes, hears what he does 

 not like. 



Little boats must keep near shore. 

 Large vessels may venture more. 



Nothing should be done in haste btit catching 

 fleas. 



Poverty makes a man acquainted with strange 

 bed-fellows. 



The horse shoe that clatters wants a nail, 

 nbidden guests knov.' not where to sit down. 



A man thtit laughs is half taken. 



A woman that painteth, puts up a bill that she 

 is to be let. 



A man's best fortune, or his worst, is a wife. 



\ woman conceals what she knows not. 



A lass that has many wooers, often fares the 

 ■worst. 



3''anaed fire and forced love nover did well, yet. 



If marriages be made in heaven, some have few 

 friends there. 



It is a good horse that never stumbles 

 And a good wife that never grumbles. 



While the tall woman is stooping, the little one 

 hath swept the liou.se. 



Women must have their wills while they live, 

 because tlicy make none when they die. 



Smoke, raining into the hoii.se, and a scolding 

 wife, will make a man run out of doors. 



He who has no bread to sj)are, should not keep 

 a dog. 



lie who has but one coat should not lend it. 



Wise men make proverbs, and fools repeat them. 



RECEIPT FOR 1,0\VNESS OP SPIRITS. 



Take one ounce of the seeds of Resolution, 

 properly mixed with the oil of Good Conscience 

 — infuse into it a large spoonful of the Salts of 

 Patience ; distil very carefully a composing plant 

 called Others Woes, which you will find in eve- 

 ry part of the Garden of Life, growing under the 

 broad lcavcsofDisgui.se — add a small rpiantity and 

 it will greatly assist the Salts of Patience in their 

 operation — gather a handful of the blossoms of 

 Hope — then sweeten them properly with a syrup 

 made of the balm of Providence ; and if you can 

 get any of the seeds of True Friendship, you will 

 have the most valuable Medicine that can bo ad- 

 ministered ; but you must be very careful to get 

 the true seed, as there is a weed which very much 

 resembles it called Selt'-interest, which will spoil 

 the whole composition. Wake the ingredients uji 

 into very small pills, which may be calleil pills of 

 Comfort — take one at night anil morning, and in 

 a short time the cure will be effectually complet- 

 ed. 



Mitional Characteristics. A pains-tnking writer 

 has remarked that an Englishman is never happy 

 but when he is miserable, a Scotchman never at 

 home but whefl he is abroad, and an Irishman never 

 al peace but when Jighting. 



The Ancient and Honorable Artillery Company 

 have given $200 to the completion of the Bunker 

 Hill monument. 



.Iwaking Suddenli/. To awaken children from 

 their sleep with a loud noise or in an impetuous 

 manner, is extremely injudicious and hurtful ; nor 

 is it proper to carry them from a dark room iin- 

 mcdiately into a glaring light, against a dazzling 

 wall ; for the sudden itnpression debilitates the or- 

 gan of vision, and lays the foundation of weak eyes 

 from early infancj'. 



The ne plus ultra of Puffery. A New York pa- 

 per tolls of a Scythe, manufactured by Messrs. 

 & Co. which was so sharp even in 



its shadow, as it hung on an apple tree in the sun, 

 as to cut a man's foot off. 



An idle fellow the other day complained bitter- 

 ly of his hard lot, and said that he was born on 

 the last day of the year, the last day of the month, 

 and the last day of the v/eek, and he had always 

 been behind hand. Ih: believed it would have been 

 a hundred dollars in his pocket if he had not been 

 born at all. 



Yl^HOI.ESAI.E AND RETAIL CASH STORE. 



ELIAB STONE BREWER, No. +U, Washington Street. 

 {South end) has received a general assortment of Spring and 

 Summer (tooits, among which are 100 cases English, French and 

 American Trinis of all prices and qualities— 20 cases Petticoat 

 Robes — 1 cuse Cambric Muslins, some of which aye very fine — 1 

 case Cotton Cambrics do. do. — 1 case '\\'hile Lilesia for lining 

 ladies dresses— 1 case Book Binders' Cambrick for do. do.—:; 

 cases do. — 1 00 cases bleached and brown Sheeting and Shirting, 

 some e.vtra line — I case Marseilles Quilts, from 8 to 10 quarters 

 — 5 cases London Rose Blankets, some of a very superior qual- 

 ity and large size — 1 case Hearth Rugs — 4- ca-scs Chapp's spool 

 6 cord cotton, warranted — 200 yards superior qualitv---5 cases 

 Clark's do. a! very low prices by doz. or case — SOOO fancy- 

 boxes — -1 large variety of colorecl and black French Silks at 

 veiy reduced prices — 2 cases col'd Battiste — 1 case black and 

 colored Barage — A cases French and Loudon printed Muslins 

 of new patterns and beautiful colors — 2 cases three corded su- 

 pcifine Italianettes, black and fashionable colors — 1 case com- 

 mon do — 1 case Plaid Palmgriin's super quality — 1 case Poii 

 de Soi a genteel article for ladies' summer dresses, 9d per yd 

 — 20 ps super mix'd, drab, and olive Merino Cassinetts for 

 children's summer dresses — 20 ps Rouen Casslmere with a largo 

 variety of superfine and fine Broadcloths and Cassimeres — 

 20 bales- Pelisse Wadding — 3 cases superior Ticking — 1 cases 

 cheapdo^ — 10 cases improved soft finished 4-4 Irish Linen, man- 

 ufactured for the Loudon market and imported expressly for 

 the subscriber. 



The above goods are offered for cash only at prices so ex- 

 tremely low as will make it an object for purchasers either bw 

 piece or yard to call and see. May 29 



THE FIII.L BLOODED HORSE SPORTSMAN. 



THE Subscriber informs the public that the above named 

 horse will stand at his stable the ensuing season, — terms J^20' 

 the season, which may be settled (or gI3 on or before the first 

 of September next. Insurance as may be agreed between the 

 parties. The stock of this horse are unusually promising and 

 will not sufler (to say the least) by comparison with the get of 

 any horse that has stood in this section for many years, and ho 

 is iherelore recommended to the public with confidence by 

 their obedient servant, S. J.4UUES. 



10 Hills Stock Farm, Cliarlestmm, 2^ miles from Boston. 



RekTcareJsmade to Thomas Williams, Esq. of Chelsea, 

 who lias colts of Sportsman's get; m8 



FOR SALE, 



TII.AT valuable country sf.i( and yiirm formerly owned by 

 E. H Derby and J. Crowninshield, Esqrs., and lately by Col. 

 Kndicotl, situated in Danvers, within two miles of Salem and 

 tiriein of Boston. The buildings are in good repair, spacious 

 ,iiid elegant, and convenient for a genteel family, and also for a 

 I innir's, with barns, stables, &c., aUached. Ihero is an ex- 

 rcllcni garden, containing a great variety of choice fruits, 

 -hrubs and flowers and a lastelul summer house. The farm is 

 in a high state of cultivation, well watered and enclosed — it 

 produces large crops of hay, grain, and vegetables, besides ap- 

 ples, pears, peaches, apricots, plums, quinces and cherries ; 

 there is a nursery of youn^ fruit trees, and a plantation of 

 0000 While Mulberries. 'ITie place has many advantages, and 

 is the most desirable country retreat in the vicinity. The build- 

 ing and garden, with from lO to 190 acres of land, as the pur- 

 chaser may choose, are offered on liberal and accommodating 

 terms. Apply at this office, or to AMOS KING. 



Danvers, March 27, 1833. 



THE NEW ENG1..\ND FARMER 



Is published every Wednesilay Evening, at g3 per annum, 

 payable at the end of the year — but those who pay within 

 sixty days from the time of subscribing, are entitled to a deduc- 

 tion of fifty cents. 



inr No paper will be sent to a distance without paymeut 

 being made in advance. 



AGENTS. 

 AVie Yor/! — G. Thorburn & Sons, G7 Liberty-street. 

 .,1/A,„„,_Wm. Thorburn, 347 Market-street. 

 I'liiljcle/phia—D. &. C. Landrf.th, 85 Chesnut-strcet. 

 Ji.illimon — I. I. Hitchcock, Publisher of American Farmer. 

 (Cincinnati — S. C. Parkhurst, 23 Lower Market-street. 

 Flushing, N. Y.—Wts. Pkiuce &, Sons, Prop. Lin. Bot. Gu. 

 Middlebitry, IV. — Wight Chapman, Merchant. 

 Hartford — Goodwin & Co. Booksellers. 

 Springfield. Ms. — E. Edwards, Merchant. 

 Neu'hnnjporl — Eeenezer Stedman. Bookseller. 

 Portsmouth, N. //.—J. W. Foster, Bookseller. 

 Portland, JI/c— Colman, Hoi.den & Co. Booksellers. 

 Augjtsta, Me. — Wm. Mann, Druggist. 

 Halifax. N. S.—P. J. Holland, Esq. Editor of Recordei. 

 Montreal, L. C. — Geo. Bent. 

 ,S(. Louis — Geo. Holton. 



Printed for Geo. C. Barrett by Ford it Damreli. 

 itIio execute every description of Book and Fancy Priiii- 

 Inv in good style, and with promptness. Orders for print- 

 ing may be left with Gro. C. Barrett, at the Agricul- 

 tural Warehouse, No. 02, North Market Street. 



