290 



The Grafe Culturist. 



dent who had become acquainted with 

 my right name. 



There are people who get angrj' 

 when oddities arc assailed, not because 

 it concerns them in any way, or be- 

 cause it touches them individually, 

 but because they believe such criti- 

 cisms to be a cut and thrust aimed at 

 their enjoyments. 



They say : w^hy do you tight, why 

 do you wish to destroy, follies that 

 are fine sport for those Avho look on ? 

 Without its silly whims the world 

 would be awfully tame and tcrribl}' 

 tiresome. Consequently let all such 

 live in peace. 



I agree completely with those who 

 talk thus, except on one point. To 

 criticise and to destroy are two very 

 different things. I have much respect 

 for those who are temperate in all 

 things. I can not but laugh a good 

 hearty laugh at all such extravagan- 

 cies as TOTAL ABSTINENCE I Such hair- 

 brainod notions richly deserve the 

 cudgel of censure. These gentlemen, 

 in spite of all raillery, will stick to 

 the white neck-tie, to short, flat hair, 

 a smooth, shaven face with sober, sor- 

 rowful looks, and will forever con- 

 spire to make us dress, look, think 

 and drink as the}- do. Oddities are 

 tenacious of life, sarcasm may restrain 

 them within bounds, they can not be 

 destroyed. 



It is the same trouble that ails me ; 

 am I not tiresome and ridiculous 

 enough to Avrite as I do — moreover, 

 do I not possess the deep conviction 

 of my conceit — a fact that can not be 

 said of the great majority of those 

 who are ridiculous — and j'ct does this 

 conviction stop my pen ? Does it 

 keeji me from sending you, now and 



then, a quantity of blackened paper 

 where conceit breaks through every 

 line? in each word I Not at all I 



In one of my former letters I hinted 

 at the whim I once had to try likewise 

 my hand at reform, and how I came 

 to drop the fanciful notion. Let me 

 now further explain ; perhaps a word 

 to the wise will be sufficient. 



The basis of the society I wanted 

 to establish would have been founded 

 on common sense. You perceive at 

 once that my first disciples would 

 essentially have required, of neces- 

 sity, the protection of the most abso- 

 lute secrecy, otherwise they would 

 have incurred the risk of being com- 

 pletely discouraged from the start 

 through sneers and derision ; few, 

 very few, would have been audaciou~ 

 enough to profess openly tlie new 

 principle. This new principle would 

 have had for foundation a certain 

 number of bold truths which I would 

 not have dared to advise the initi- 

 ated to utter in public even in our 

 free country'. 



You may judge for 3-ourself from 

 the following aphorisms and articles 

 of faith : "Twice two are four. A 

 straight line is shorter than a crooked 

 one. Gas is not light. Hypocris}- is 

 not virtue. Might is not right. All the 

 days are the Lord's as well as Sunday. 

 Total abstinence is no more temper- 

 ance than avariciousness is econora}'.'' 



I am perfectl}' aware that light 

 minds will luugh while reading these 

 rules of Vt'isdom ; but let the serious 

 and thoughtful ones reflect how many 

 vanities, prejudices, passions, interests, 

 acquired and established positions in 

 the world would be vrounded, broken, 

 destroj'ed by a severe application of 



