87»5 



THE GENESEE FARMER. 



Blistdlancous. 



(J:'*' 



PRAYING FOR RAIN. 



■We hCHrd a dozen men complain, 



When Weilnesday Uhftraii to rain; 



Just as ' efore, wlicn it was dry, 



Ttiev moiirnnd a ilroiith with many a sigh, 



And seemed most strimsely to forget 



That wat'.T seiu'rully ie wet! 



If all men's prayers were heard together, 



Tlie world woul il have ihe queerest weather. 



" My mill stands still !— O Lord, give rain ! " 



" My wruin is d' wn I — O Lord, r- train ! " 



" My i-(irn is parch d I " — '• Ah, Susan's bonnet— 



D.m't let a drop of wat'T on it! " 

 " O not to diiv, o\ir washing's out ! " 

 " l!oll up, ye clouds ! I go f. r trout ! " 

 " The hen's come off — the brood is drowned ! " 

 '* Ah, let it pour ! my boat's aground ! " 



So, 'mid the murmurs of the world, 

 The clouds like banners are unfurled ; 

 The rain de>cends, the bow Is bent. 

 The sky smiles ole:ir, God's laure tent; 

 Sweet ei)rings and rid)lnssing together, 

 And, rain or shiuc. 'tis pleasant weather; 

 The sowi-r's hopeful seed !■< flune, 

 And harvest songs are always sung. 



An Idea of Faith. — A female teacher of a school that 

 stood on the bank of a stream wished to communicate to 

 her pupils an idea of faith. While she was trying to ex- 

 plain to them the meaning of the word, a small boat 

 glided in sight along the stream. Seizing upon the inci- 

 dent for an illustration, she exclaimed : 



" If I were to tell you that there was a leg of mutton 

 in that boat, you would believe me, would you not, with- 

 out even seeing it yourselves ?" 



"Yes, ma'am," replied the scholars. 



" Well, that is faith," said the schoolmistress. 



" The next day, in order to test their recollection of the 

 lesson, she inquired : 



"What is faith?" 



"A leg of mutton in a boat ! " was the answer, shouted 

 from all parts of the schoolroom. 



Women' Sthoxger than Oxen. — It is related of a cer- 

 tain New England divine who flourished not many years 

 ago, and whose matrimonial relations are supposed not 

 to have been of the most agreeable kind, that one Sab- 

 bath morning, while reading to his congregation the 

 parable of Ihe supper, in Luke xr, in which occurs this 

 passage — "And another said, I have bought five yoke of 

 oxen, aud 1 go to prove them; I pray thee have me ex- 

 cused : and another said, I have married a wife, and 

 therefore car^not come" — he suddenly paused at the end 

 oi this verse, drew off his spectacles, and looking round 

 on his hearers, said, with emphasis : " The fact is, my 

 brethren, one woman can draw a man further from ibe 

 kingdom of heaven tlinnfioe yoh^of oxen!" 



A Patlandbr, angling in the rain, was observed to 

 keep bis line under the arch of a bridge. Upon being 

 asked the reii.<on, he replied : " Sure, an' won't the fishes 

 be crowdiii' lliereto keep out uv the wet?" 



Xbver own that your wife is right; do it once, and on 

 the conceit of it >he will b^ wrong the rest of her life. 



Strange Habits of Bees in Peru. — A recent trave^er 

 sends the following interesting fact in natural history 

 from Areqniperu, Peru: A few years ago, a German got 

 out a few hives of bees, an insect formerly unknown here. 

 The first year he obtained a plentiful supply of honey, 

 but year after year it decreased until now the bees will 

 hardly collect any. And why? Our climate is so equable 

 that flowers can be had all the year round, and the sa- 

 gacious insects having discovered this fact have evidently 

 lost the instinct of hoarding honey for a winter that never 

 comes. 



Foolscap Paper. — In Charles the Fir.st's time all Eng- 

 lish paper bore in water marks the Royal Arms. The 

 Parliament under Cromwell made jests of this law in 

 every conceivable manner; and, among other indignities 

 to the memory of Kipg Charles, it was ordered that the 

 Royal Arms be removed from the paper, and the "fool's 

 cap and bells" be substituted. These, in their turn, were 

 also removed, when the Rump Parliament was prorogued ; 

 but paper of the size of the Parliament journal still bears 

 the name of "foolscap." 



Value ofEari^t Rising. — The difference between rising 

 every morning at six and at eight, in the course of forty 

 years, supposing a man to go to bed at the same time be 

 otherwise would, amounts to twenty-nine thousand hours, 

 or three years, one hundred and twenty-one days and sis- 

 teen hours, which will afford eight hours a day for ex- 

 actly ten years ; so that is the same as if ten years of life 

 were added, in which we could command eight hours 

 every day for the cultivation of our minds or the dispatch 

 of business. 



A Stomp Orator. — An Ohio stumper, while making a 

 speech, paused in the midst of it, and exclaimed: "Now, 

 gentlemen, what do you think?" Instantly a man rose 

 in the a.^sembly, and, with one eye partially closed, mod- 

 estly replied: "I think, sir, I do, indeed, sir — I think if 

 you and I were to stump the country together we would 

 tell more lies than any other two men in the country, sir, 

 and I'd not say a word during the whole time, sir." 



It is related that once upon a time a Mayor of Folke- 

 stone .«ent a remarkably large sturgeon to the Lord Mayor 

 of London, who, in acknowledging the present, assured 

 his worshipful brother that he would fake an early oppor- 

 tunity to send him an "equivalent," which word the 

 Folkestone dignitary read " elephant," and accordingly 

 built a large reception-house for the huge quadruped be- 

 fore he discovered his mistake. 



A MAN of wit was asked in a train, " What was bis 

 errand to the city?" He replied, "I have been sent to 

 procure au angel to do the cooking." 



A BfsiNEss man of our acquaintance is so scrupulously 

 exact in all his doings, that whenever he pays a visit he 

 always will insist upon taking a receipt. 



Tub young lady who took the gentleman's fancy has 

 returned it with thanks. 



WoME.v can keep a secret, but it generally takes a good 

 many of them to do it. 



