64 



NEW ENGLAND FARMER. 



FEMALK FELICITY. 

 Wliat happiness the rural maid attends, 

 In cheerful labor while each day she spends I 

 She gratefi:lly receives what Heaven has sent, 

 And rich in competence enjoys content ; 

 (Such happiness, and such umblemish'd fame 

 Ne'er glad the bosom of the courtly dame ;) 

 She never feels the spleen's imagin'd pains, 

 No melancholy stagnates in her veins ; 

 She never wastes her life in thoughtless ease, 

 Nor on the velvet couch invites disease. 

 Her home-spun dress adorns her person more 

 Than all the gew gaws grandeur ever wore. 

 In reputation (which is all her boast) 

 She stands superior to each reigning toast, 

 For malice never meddles with her name, 

 Nor envy dares her purity defame. 

 No midnight masquerade her beauty wears, 

 No paint her waning loveliness repairs ; 

 No home-bred jars her quiet state control. 

 No watchful jealousy torments her soul. 

 If love's soft passion in her bosom reign. 

 An equal passion thrills her happy swain ; — 

 Soon Hymen joins assenting hearts and hand?. 

 The parson twines and sanctifies the bands. 

 At length with joy she sees her little race 

 Hang on her bosom, and her cottage grace ; 

 The fleecy ball their busy fingers cull. 

 Or from the spindle draw the length'ning wool ; 

 Thus flow her hours with constant peace of mind. 

 Till age the latest thread of life unwind. 



From the Providence Journal. 

 We have in fresh recollection, an incident, 

 which led to the separation of man and wife, 

 which in the original was the most trilling ; but 

 in the ser|uel was disastrous and distressing, A 

 gentleman received one morning, when at the 

 breakfast table, a cup of coflee from the hand of 

 his wife, which contained the oil of a small 

 piece of butter which had accidentally fallen in- 

 to the cup. Louisa, said the husband good hu- 

 inoredly, I'll thank you to give me a cup of cof- 

 fee that is pure and unadulterated. Henry, re- 

 plied the wife, do you think it is poisoned ? No, 

 certainly not, but 1 should prefer having another 

 cup. Indeed you shall, replied Louisa, but per- 

 mit me to drink that which you complain of 

 No, madam, you shall not, replied tlie husband 

 sternly, and instantly threw the contents of the 

 cup into the bosom of Louisa, She rose hastily 

 from the table, looked wistfully towards Heniy, 

 and wildly gazed on all around her. With lin- 

 gering steps she moved from the apartment, and 

 for the last time looked a farewell to Henry, 



An uninterrupted silence ensued, but when the 

 consternation of the persons present subsided, 

 the distracted husband, in a paroxysm of despair, 

 rushed into the street, and followed the footsteps 

 of crazed Louisa, In vain he sought her in ev- 

 ery nook and corner of tlie city, for she was 

 ' not to be found, and the frantick husband retur- 

 ned hopeless and hapless to his desolated inan- 

 sion, where he indulged in excessive sorrow and 

 despair. Scarce two hours had ehipsod before 

 Mrs, A. was returned to her hus'.iaml, not glow- 

 ing m youth and beauty, but a lifeless corpse. 

 The treatment she received from him she loved 

 crazed her, and in the moment of distraction 

 she committed suicide, Mr, A. survived the 

 shock a few months, when he expired, and in 

 Lis last moments lisped the name of Louisa, and 

 jirayed fur her ibrgiveness. 



From the Old Colony Memorial. 



Various as (he inclinations of men, are the 

 occupations of life. Labor for support, was in 

 the beginning, the appointment of Heaven. It 

 has ever been, as it were, a condition of human 

 existence. He v;ho is too gooil^ or rather ^oo 

 indolent, to make exertion, is too good, or rath- 

 ea too indolent, to live. 



But in no employment, can so much profit be 

 combined with so much pleasure, as in that of 

 Agriculture. Although the farmer is not dis- 

 tinguished with the same honors that a grateful 

 country bestows on her warriors, be it remem- 

 bered, the wreath of the victor, the price of 

 ■' garments rolled in blood" is to be obtained 

 only at the risque of life and fortune. Al- 

 though he does not share with the seaman, in 

 the charms of novelty, the delight of gazing 

 at the wonders of distant cities, yet winds and 

 waves and lawless men perhaps must be encoun- 

 tered, before these charms of novelty, these dis- 

 tant cities can be brought to view. The cup of 

 the farmer is not thus mixed with doubt and un- 

 certainty. Raised not above the common level 

 of maidiind, he is equally free from the wants 

 thai creep around the cottages of the poor, and 

 the plagues that haunt the door of the wealthy. 

 Not depending upon other men for his food and 

 clothing,he possesses and can use them at his will. 

 To labor in the season for laboring, is no more 

 than he expects; and when the frosts and snows 

 of winter have bound him to his cottage, he 

 enjoys the fruit of his labors. In such enjoy- 

 ment, there is more satisfaction than the splen- 

 did retinues and luxurious feasts of Emperors 

 can afford. 



" Thus in some deep retirement, would I pass 

 The winter glooms, with friends of pliant soul, 

 Or blithe, or solemn, as the theme inspired." 



" Two pence for my cresses," cried a little 

 boy in the streets of Philadelphia one day — he 

 is now an eminent merchant and worth millions 

 of pence — " La ! pa, how mean it looks to see 

 that little boy crj'ing cresses for two pence," 

 said a little gentleman whom he passed one day 

 — that person died a poor creature in gaol. 

 Learn this lesson. Two pence is but the begin- 

 ning of shillings — shillmgs of fortune — fortune 

 of ease and luxury. Look well to your two 

 pences and fear not. But neglect them and 

 they will neglect you — they come not like the 

 physician in the hour of adversity, but when 

 the sun is up and the day of health lasts. 



Romantic Lover. — .\ romantic story is related 

 of an Englishman, who sought the hand of a 

 very charming lady, with whom he was passion- 

 ately in love, but who constantly refused him. 

 As he had reason to believe she loved him, he 

 entreated to know the reason why she refused 

 her consent to their union. Tiie lady, subdued 

 by his constancy, told him that her only motive 

 for refusing him was, that havibg^by an accident 

 lost a leg, it had been replaced by a wooden 

 one ; and she feared that sooner or later this 

 circumstance would cliiH his alTection for hei'. 

 This she declared to be her only motive. The 

 lover protested that this would never make him 

 change his love ; but sho persisted in rci'using 

 to inar.'-y him. Fired with love, and determin- 

 ed that iiotiiing should obstruct his design, he, 

 under the [irctext of going a distant voyage. 



I: 



left the lady and hastened to Paris, where 

 had one of his own legs amputated. When 

 had recovered, he returned to London, wen^ 

 the lady, and told her that there was now no 

 stacle to their union, for that he was equa 

 mutilated with herself The lady, conquejj n 

 by such a proof ot affection, at last consenfe( 

 marry him. — Atheneum. 



Douhh-tongued Lady. — The Brighton (E 

 lish) paper mentions, that there is at pres 

 residing in Brighton, a lady of great beauty 

 accomplishments, possessed of a quality w 

 puts out of all distance the fame of the cele 

 ted Mc. Doublelungs. This extraordinary 

 singular faculty arises from a peculiar formal 

 of the tongue, which is separated to the rooi 

 a longitudinal direction, and actually for 

 double tongue. Not the slightest inconveni 

 is felt from the exuberant gift of nature. V 

 this desirable and admirable addition to the 

 gan of domestic comfort, this lady is enablei 

 afford entertainment to her friends, beyond 

 power of any ventriloquist, or indeed com 

 tion. From the personal charms she possei 

 as well as a highly endowed mind, she has 

 many suitors, some of whom have retired 

 paying homage, owing to the effects of the 

 tra clapper hung in this enchanted bell 

 possesses two voices : one exceedingly cl 

 sweet, and harmonious, allowing her to 

 with great effect : the other so esquis: 

 thrilling, that it must have been bestowe 

 her for no other purpose than to lisp the 

 small voice of love. With this voice 

 tales exactly the notes of many birds, pi; 

 like a bultinch, singing as a canary. Whi 

 remarkable, her mother was deaf and duml 



Suit at fas'. — Two suitors at court bein| 

 conciled to each other after a very tedious 

 expensive suit, applied to an artist to paint ai 

 vice in commemoration of their returning a| 

 and peace. The artist accordingly paintet 

 in his shirt and the other stark naked. 



I will admit that it is impossible for any I 

 not to have some enemies. But this truth :" 

 long experience, I assert that he who has i 

 most friends, and the fewest enemies, isj 

 strongest; will rise the highest with the 

 envy; and fall, if he does fall, the gentlest! 

 the most pitied. This is surely an object w 

 pLTSuing. 1 will add one observation 

 and then conclude. There is no one creti 

 so obscure, so low, or so poor, who may noj 

 the strange and unaccountable changes 

 issitudes of human affairs, somehow or other 

 come an useful friend, or a troublesome enfl 

 to the greatest and the richest. — Clieslcrjieli 



There are people, ivho, like new songsJ 

 in vogue only lor a time. 



TKRMS OF THK FARMER. 



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