400 



NEW ENGLAND FARMER. 



JVJiE 14, 1843. 



MISCELLANEOUS 



ECCENTRICITIES OF A MADMAN. 



Mr , a liiwyer in Vermont, doing a good 



business, at once became insane, and took it into 

 his head to abandon the practice of law, and en- 

 gage in basket-making. He was at first a very 

 awkward hand at this employment, but by dint of 

 perseverance, hn soon became very skillful, and 

 could weave a basket as well as he had formerly 

 woven an argument at the bar. He followed this 

 business about six months, when taking a new no- 

 tion into his head, he abandoned it for that of chair 

 bottoming. 



The material used in this business was bark, 

 which is stripped from the trees in sinnmer, when 

 it peels most easily. Having come home one day 

 covered from head to foot with mud, he was asked 

 where he had been, that he had got so thoroughly 

 bedaubed. He answered, that he had been in a 

 neighboring swamp after elm bark, of which he ex- 

 liibited a strip about forty feet long. 



" Do you remark this?" said he triumphantly. 



"Yes; but how does this account for your be- 

 ing so muddy.' It isn't usual to find mud on the 

 top of a tree." 



" No, but you may sometimes find it at the bot- 

 tom, though. I '11 tell you how I found it. I cut 

 the bark near the root of the tree, and then stripped 

 it upwards, expecting it would come to an end and 

 break ofl^, and run itself out alter a while. But it 

 hung on like a suit in chancery — and I stript, and 

 stript, until it run up forty feet, and as strong as 

 ever. Thinks I to myself, there is no use in pur- 

 suing the thing any farther, and so I '11 enter a 

 nolle prosequi. But not to lose the benefit of what 

 I had done — that was the point to be decided. I 

 wished at least to save costs. But pshaw ! I for- 

 got — I 'm not a lawyer now. Well, as I was say- 

 ing, I looked at the subject to see how I could se- 

 cure the bark. It was too strong for me to break 

 off. At any rate, thought I, there's more ways 

 than one to skin a cat: if I cannot break off this 

 bark, I can climb up by it. No sooner thought 

 than done. I seized hold of the strip, and placing 

 my feet against the trunk of the tree, ran up hand 

 over hand. Uy this method of climbing, you will 

 perceive that my back must have been downward, 

 and nearly in a horizontal position, — my feet being 

 braced against the tree, and my head standing 

 from it in an angle of nearly ninety degrees. Hav- 

 ing arrived at the proper height, I was then in a 

 quandary how to get my knife out of my pocket, 

 and how to get it open when it was out. If I let 

 go wiih one hand, I was fearful the other would 

 not hold me. However, says I, it's neck or noth- 

 ing. I '11 try the experiment at any rate — so I 

 gripped powerfully with my left hand, while I took 

 out my knife with my right, and opening it wjth 

 my teeth, whipped off the bark as clean as the law 

 would dock an entail. And what do you think was 

 the result ?" 



" Why, you came down flat on your back, of 

 course." 



" Right, gentlemen of the jury — a very correct 

 verdict indeed. I came down flat in the mud. 

 Never was a client laid flatter on his back than I, 

 and never was one so completely bedaubed with 

 filth and mud. But, thanks to the yielding nature 

 of the soil, I saved my bones, and only brought 

 away the mischief on my coat. I gained my cause 

 loo — which is more than I can say of all my un- 

 dertakings." 



Tlie company laughed heartily at the ex-lawyer's 

 account of his exploit, while the latter, hanging 

 his coat up in the sun, said that the mud, like the 

 old woman's grease, would rub off when it was dry. 



He continued awhile longer to follow his occu- 

 pation of chair bottoming, when suddenly becom- 

 ing sane again, he resumed the practice of law, 

 and has, ever .«ince, preferred laying his opponents 

 on iheir backs, in a legal way, to being laid on his 

 own in so ludicrous a manner as that above rela- 

 ted.— A. Y. Trans. 



The. Spirit of Liberty. — Soon after the close of 

 the long French war in Europe, a boy was stand- 

 ing on one of the bridges that cross the Thames 

 at London, with a number of small birds in a cage 

 for sale. A sailor, who was passing, observed the 

 little prisoners fluttering about the cage, peeping 

 through the wires, and manifesting their eager de- 

 sire to regain their liberty. He stood for some 

 time looking at the birds, apparently lost in thought. 

 At length, addressing the boy, he said — 



" How much do you ask for your birds ?" 



" Sixpence apiece, sir, was the reply. 



" I do n't ask how much apiece," said the sailor, 

 "but how much for the lot: I want to buy the 

 whole." 



The boy began his calculations, and finally of- 

 fered them for six shillings and sixpence. 



"There's your money," said the sailor, and 

 opening the cage door, he let all the birds fly away. 



The boy, looking quite astonished, exclaimed, 

 " What did you do that for, sir.' You have lost 

 all your birds." 



" I 'II tell you, boy. I was shut np three years 

 in a French prison, as a prisoner-of-war — I know 

 how precious liberty is, and I am resolved never to 

 see any thing deprived of it that 1 can make free." 

 — Selected. 



cheese: presses. 



SELF-GOVERNING CHEESE PRESSES— two kinds 

 —lately improved hy llie Shakers. These are so construct- 

 ed that they goVerii and regulate thcmselres williout weights, 

 and are ijy Jar the best presses now in use. 



For sale at the N. E. Agricultural Warehouse, 51 and 62 

 North Market street. JOS. BRECK & CO. 



June 7, 1843. 



HOWARD'S IMPROVED EASY DRAUGHT PLOUGH. 



Great improvements have heen made the past yenr in tl 

 form and workmanship of these Ploughs ; the mould hca 

 has lieen so formed as to lay the fiirrmr nomplelely om 

 turning in evenj particle of g-rass or stubble, and icuvhi' I 

 ground m the best possible manner. The leiicth oi^ i 

 mould hoard has he n very much increased, so that t 

 Plough works with the greatest case, holh with re-;ppct 

 the holding and the team. The Committee at the late tn 

 of Ploughs at Worcester, say, 



" Should our opinion he asked as to which of the Ploui; 

 we should prefer for use on a farm, we might perhaps say 

 the inquirer, if your land is mostlv light and easy In win 

 try Prouty & Mears, hut if your lan'dis heavij, hard orrock 

 BEGIN wrrH Ma. How;\rd'3.'' 



At the above mer.t:oned trial the Howard Pl-^ugh o 

 more work, with the same pewer of team, than any oti, 

 plough exhibited. No other turned more than twentyse? 

 and one half inches, to the 112 Ihs. draiiglit, while I 

 Howard Plongh turned twentijnineand one' half inches 

 the same power of team ! All acknowledge that Howun 

 Ploughs are much the strongest and most substantin 

 made. 



There has been quite an improvement made on the sh 

 or land side of this Plough, which can be renewed willii 

 having to furnish a newlandside; this shoe likewise secu 

 tlie mould hoard and iandside together, and strengthens I 

 Plough very much. 



The price of the Ploughs is from S6 to Si 5. A Ploiii 

 sufficient for breaking up with four cattle, will cost ain 

 tlO 60, and with cutter $1, with wheel and cutter, t2 

 extra. 



The above Ploughs are for sale, wholesale and retail 

 the New England Agricultural Warehouse and Seed St. 

 Nos. 51 & 52 North Market Street, hy 



JOSEPH BRECK & CO 



^^#iin>>. 



GRINDSTONES ON FRICTION ROLLERS. 



Grindstones of different sizes, hung on friction roUera 

 moved with a loot Ircader, is iound to lie a great impn | 

 mem on the old mode of hanging grindstones. Stones h 

 in this manner are hecoming daily more in use, and wlier 

 used, give universal sati-sfaction. The rollers can he att 

 ed to stones hung in the common way. For sale tq 

 BRECK & Co., No. 51 North Market street. 



LACTOMETERS— a simple instrument for trt 

 the quality of milk. For sale by J. BRECK & 0( 



NEW ENGLAND FARMER. 



A WEKKLY PAPKR. 



Terms, .fSper year in advance, or $2 00 if»^™|, 

 within thirty days. ^^BH 



N. B. — Postmasters arc permitted by law to fri 

 subscriptions and remittances for newspapers, will 

 expense to subsoribera. 



TUTTLE AND BEIVNETT. PRIMTERSi 



21 School Street. 



