NEW ENGLAND FARMER 



Jl'l.Y 7, 1841. 



MISCELLANfOUS. 



A BLAST FROM THE "P. D."! 

 A paper called the " Pulriot and Democrat," 

 which linils from "Roxbury and Dcdham," has 

 copied ouii " Wellerisms" and piven us no credit 

 for thorn. This is the height of meanness, if not 

 the depth of depravity ; and if the perpetrators of 

 this kind of "petty larceny" do not mend their 

 wavs, wc shall call upon "Dow, Jr." to preach 

 them a lecture upon their " besetting sin." — Our 

 " Combativcness" — in phrenological parlance — is 

 "small" — but we would f;o as far out of our way 

 to kick one of these ffllowg, as John Randolph said 

 he would to kick a sheep ! — We have all sorts of 

 resppcl for the editorial fraternity, but we will not 

 permit themi to take a grist from our mill without 

 piving us the customary toll for grinding it: — in 

 thi.s determination we are fixed. — Culprits ! am'l 

 you ashnmeil to cheat the poor "P. D." out of his 

 just dues in this way! Suppose he should sulTer 

 his genius!.' to slumber, where then would you 

 get the gems of thought with which to spice your 

 otherwise insipid pages!!! — ffe have "reserved 

 rights," recoiled, as well as you ; and we mm/, 

 when forbearance has ceased to be a virtue, throw 

 ourself upon them — and if wc are forced to thi.s, 

 somtbodtj will suffer — that's certain ! ! ! — Wc are 

 blessed with luore than an ordinary share of good 

 nature, but there is also a sprinkling of us opposite 

 in our composition — and when that is excited, we 

 are all of a hornet's nest — an article which it is 

 the part of wisdom to avoid meddling with!! — 

 Enough said : we have " defined our position" — 

 we can maintain it — and by Jupiter wo win, ! ! ! 



" Thrice is he armid who hath his quarrel just." 



Mr Editor, if you will allow the above to fill an 

 unoccupied corner of your "miscellaneous" page, 

 the undersigned will consider himself under new 

 obligations to be 



Your servant at command, 



N. E. F.'s " P. D." 



From the New V'ork Mercury. 

 A SHORT PATENT SERMON 



ON IDLEXF.SS. 



I have selected the following words as a text for 

 my present discourse : — 



Thus at full length the pampprcd monarch lay. 

 Flattening in ease and slumbering lifii away. 



.\}y Hearers : notwithstanding that Industry, 

 with her bran new broom, has swept ten thousand 

 evils into the dust pan of oblivion, still if we look 

 into the dark corners of this wide world, we shall 

 find that the cobwebs of sloth, large and strong 

 enough to entangle turkey buzzard.s, are yet hang"- 

 ing there, obscuring the few feeble rays of entPr- 

 prise that yet glimmer in those benighted region-. 

 The three-story Patagonian of the south wallows 

 in the mire of indolence, and grows fat upon the 

 grave of ignorance ; the Lilliputian Laplander of 

 the North lolls in laziness, and willingly puts up 

 with the cold porridge of poverty ; the fesmeared 

 Hottentot of the East snoozes in his mud-built hut, 

 careless of tomorrow's fare, and content to feed 

 with the crumbs that fall from some Blray angel's 

 bread. But, my friends, while these half finished 

 hiiserable models of humanity are thus slumbering 

 amid the stupefying vapors of ease, I want you to 



reflect upon what a sad condition their poor souls 

 are in. Tneir thoughts never are thrust beyond 

 the filthy circle of some selfish desire — their hearts 

 lie soaking in the gastric fluid of their stomachs — 

 their understandings are darker than the catecombs 

 of Egypt — and their codes of morals are made up 

 of nature's loose leaves, barely stuck together with 

 the thin paste of instinct. 



My dear friends — sloth is not wholly confined to 

 the gloomy arena of heatheni.sm. It often lies at 

 the door of enlightment, and rubs ita slime upon the i 

 silken frock of refinement. I have seen it strew 

 the parlors of the rich with sleepy poppies, and 

 surround the poor man's cottage with noxiobs 

 weeds. I have seen it take all the stiffening out 

 of the stoutest energies of man, and cover youth- 1 

 ful ambition with the blue mould of morbidity ; I 

 have seen it so f.isten itself upon the back of the 

 the sluggish traveller as to prevent him from mov- 

 ing from the track when the railroad car of death 

 was hard upon his heels ; and I have even seen 

 people lie down and roll into their graves, like a 

 lifeless log, too lazy to exert themselves in their 

 own behalf: and I expect that when the last trump 

 shall arouse them from their sepulchral slumbers, 

 they will raise themselves upon their elbows, and 

 growl like a dog with a sore foot because they 

 have been disturbed so soon. When 1 pass by a 

 country farm-house and find old Imts, coats and 

 breeches stuffed in at the windows, I know that the 

 god of indolence is lounging there, in the midst of 

 want, wo, and poverty — that the lank children of 

 necessity are there running up to seed in the shade 

 of neglect, unmoistened by the dews of moral in- 

 struction. I also know that idleness is pampered 

 by the pap of excessive wealth, and that where 

 riches abundantly abound, the tares of sloth are 

 yielding a bountiful harvest. Lazy fogs surround 

 the head of him whom lucre has lulled to drowsi- 

 ness, and he knows not how to shake off" the leth- 

 argic incubus which sits upon its breast, and sticks 

 faster than a blood-sucker, to a dead cat-fish. 

 He eats, drinks and sleeps for the sake of diverting 

 his attention from the lumbering wheels of Time 

 that roll heavily by ; and in the midst of his self- 

 styled ease, there are no such convenient articles 

 as peace and happiness to be found. Why, my 

 friends, I have known men of wealth and respecta- 

 bility, whose physical faculties had become so 

 paralyzed with indolence that it would require ex- 

 tra high pressure fever and ague to bring their 

 muscles into active service. Ves, my dear hearers, 

 I say I have seen such men ; and one good chimney 

 sweep is worth more in a well regulated and in- 

 dustrious community, than as many such aa could 

 be packed between the eastern cape of Africa and 

 the outskirts of eternity. 



O, my friends ! I regret to say that idleness has 

 (if late become a fashionable accomplishment with 

 too large a portion of our young population. 

 Employment is getting to be thought vulgar, and 

 a toil-hardened hand not fit to be otfered for the 

 acceptance of ihe fair sex. Give me a hard hand, 

 a hard head, and a soft heart; but instead of 

 which, soft hands, soft heads, and hard hearts, are 

 now all the go in what the dispeptic pimps of eti- 

 quette call the beau mondc. 'I'lie caterpillers of 

 shuh are making great havoc in our neglected 

 juvenile nurseries. 'I'hey are stripping the young 

 shrubs of promi.Hc; of their greenest foliage, and 

 blightning the buds of enlbrprise as fast as they 

 appear. If matters go on in this way much longer 

 the rising generation will soon become fit for noth- 



ing but to be hung up as scare crows in the moral 

 grain fields to frighten young men into habits ol 

 industry. Those who subsist, like wood-cocks, by 

 suction, and wet their brazen brows with arlificia 

 sweat, are too numerous to mention. They ar( 

 thicker than toads after a shower: they infest oui 

 public bar-rooms, and block up the avenues to pros 

 pertiy. It requires a more powerful galvanic bat 

 tery than I possess to reanimate their dying car 

 casscs and set their dormant faculties in a health) 

 operation. 



Arouse ye ! arouse ye I ye sin-soaked sons o 

 sloth, and, with your hands, lay the corner stone; 

 of your respective fortunes. Sow the seeds of in 

 dustry in the days of your youth, and you 

 have the satisfaction of reaping a glorious harves 

 of plenty in the autumn of life. If you ever Ihinl 

 of erecting for yourselves splendid temples of fami 

 you must strip ambition of its robes of vanity, an( 

 commence the work forthwith. If you fall aslee] 

 when the edifice is half completed, the chances ar' 

 ten to one that when you awake you will find 

 crushed to earth, and its ruins overgrown with thi 

 grey moss of despair. O, my friends ! ytm mus 

 be up and doing, if you wish to prosper in this pre 

 carious world. Just keep on squandering li(e' 

 blessed moments in the indulgence of sluggis 

 dreams, and if you don't eventually slide int 

 eternity shirtlesF, shiftless and shoeless, then us 

 my hat for a spit-box, and set me down as one c 

 the humbugs of the age. But industry, my hear 

 ers, can clothe the tattered mendicant in scarle 

 and purple, and patch up the broken windows c 

 want with the aid of that putty which abidelh foi 

 ever. Heaven hugs to its bosom the honest an 

 the industrious of the sons of earth — and rocks th 

 cradle of repose, where slumber the children ( 

 daily toil. Let us work while we live — and go t 

 our long homes with the satisfaction of liavin 

 done our duty to our Maker, to onr neighbor, an 

 to ourselves. So mote it be ! Dow, Jr. 



DRAFT AND TRACE CHAINS. 



Just recoiled t)y Packet CorouianHa, 

 400 pair Trace Chains, suitable lor Ploughing. 

 200 " Truck and leading Chains. 

 200 " Draft Chains. For sale hy J. BRECK t CC 

 No. 52 North Market !>t. AprilSI 



VOR SA.L.K. 



GEORGE THE THIIID, who has been honored with 1 

 Second an<t First Slate premunis in IS39, at Worcester, ai 

 at Concord in 18tn, hy the Committees appointed hy li 

 State, for awardine such premiums, is of Durham Breed, w 

 im|Hjrted as most sup<>rior stock, and is thought by judg 

 Ifi possess more valuahle points, than any to be found in ai 

 other animal of the kind. 



Also, two young P.ulls, Sired hy the above, their Dams a 

 uiiporteJ una of the licst possilde hlootl. 



For further information apply to CHARLES WI 

 LARD 2d, Still River Village, Harvard. 4w June 2 



GRINDSTONES. 



An eilensivc assortment of Water and Hand Grindstor 

 conslnnllv on h:ind and for tale l.y AMMl C. LOMBAI 

 &. CO. 13 I.cwiss Wharf. i-ly. Not. 17. 



NEW ENGLAND FARMER. 



A WEKKLT PAPER. 



The EditnrinI department nl'tl, Ik paper having cnr 



ro the hands of the subscriher, ho is now authoriz 



j hy tlio publishers to inform the public that the price 



Ihe pnpci 1,4 reduced. In future the terms will be ; 



per year in adronce, ut £2 00 if not pnid within thir 



duys. AI.LEN PUTNAM. 



N. B. — PoptniBstcrs are required by law to frank 



sobscriptiiins nnd reniillances for newspaperi, witho 



expense to subucriberK. 



