20 



THE FARMER'S MONTHLY VISITOR. 



February, 1842. 



what means he succeeded to the throne of Eng- 

 land, and often said " lie was afraid he was keep- 

 ing some honest man out of his place." His ma- 

 jesty's pen-maker was palpably unworthy of hold- 

 ing that office, for, in this autograph, both up 

 strokes and down were so thick that they look- 

 ed as if done with the feather of the quill instead 

 of its point. 



."Vfterwards was displayed a commission signed 

 by George the Second. Here the royal caligraphy 

 seemed on the mend. The signature was well 

 written, and his majesty's pen-provider was evi- 

 dently fit for his station. 



Last, was a papei' bearing the name of George 

 the Third, written in a fair and easy hand, but ra- 

 ther inferior to that of his predecessor, notwith- 

 standing that the second of the Hanoverian mon- 

 archs had " never liked tainting or 6oeiry in all 

 his life, and did not know what good there was 

 in either." 



It is a most fallacious and illiberal hypothesis 

 that the haud-wriling is characteristic of the mind. 

 And those who profess that theory frequently em- 

 ploy it as a vehicle for the conveyance of imper- 

 tinent and unjust remarks. 



We were next shown to a small portion of 

 moss gathered from the time-honored roof of 

 Bradgate Hall, the mansion in wjiicli the ujfor- 

 tiinato Lady Jane Grey first saw light. 



These relics of the departed great were follow- 

 ed by the exhibition of some little articles, only 

 remarkable as specimens of mechanical ingenui- 

 ty. Among them was a large deep-red mulberry, 

 looking surpiisinj;ly like a real one. 



" And now. (saiifMiss Catharine,) I will show 

 you the greatest cmiosity of all." She then took 

 out an inner paste- board bo.x that had been placed 

 within the larger one, and setting it on the floor, 

 produced, from a round hole in the lid, an artifi- 

 cial snake, that looked something like a very long, 

 very close string of button-moulds. By giving it 

 some mysterious impulse, she set the reptile in 

 motion, and caused it to run about in the neigh- 

 borhood of our feet. We thought it best to be a 

 little startled and a little frightened, and greatly 

 surprised at the ingenuity of the thing. After 

 we had sufficiently enjoyed the sight, Miss Cath- 

 arine attempted to replace her snake in the box, 

 telling him it was time to go home. But beseem- 

 ed rather refractory, and quite unwilling to re- 

 enter his prison. " What" — said she — chastising 

 him with two or three smart taps—" won't you 

 go in — are you a rebel too ?" Tlie serpent stood 

 rebuked, and then obediently hm-ried back inio 

 his hole, — and we laughed as in duty bound also 

 with some admiration at the old lady's slight of 

 hand in managing the reptile. 



Miss Catharine, having completed the exhibi- 

 tion of her snake, now addressed Miss Mary, and 

 proposed that her sister should show usan extra- 

 ordinary trick, "which always astonished the la- 

 dies." To this Miss Mary made some objection, 

 lest we should have her taken up and hanged for 

 a witch. On our promising not to do so, she took 

 a scrap of white paper which she tore into four 

 little bits, and then laid them in a row on the 

 table. 



Having done this, she loft the room, shutting 

 the door closely after her, so ns to convince us, 

 that while remaining outside it was impossible 

 for her to see or hear any thing that was done in 

 her absence. Miss Catharine now desired me to 

 touch, with my finger, one of the bits of paper — 

 any one I pleased. I touched the setfond — and 

 Miss Mary was then called in hy her sister, who 

 said to her, as she entered, "Be quick." Miss 

 Mary immediately advanced to the table, and un- 

 hesitatingly designated the second paper as that 

 which I touched wiiile she was out of the room. 

 Being unacquainted with the trick, I was really 

 surprised ; and Vvondered how she could have 

 guessed so correctly. The trick was several times 

 repeated, and every time with perfect success. 



After 1 had been thoroughly astonished, and 

 declared my utter inability to fathom the mystery, 

 the sisters explained to me its very simple pro- 

 cess. The four bits of paper, arranged on the 

 table in a row, denoted the first four letters of the 

 alphabet When I touched the second, which 

 signified B, Miss Catharine directed her sister to 

 it by saying, as she returned to the room— "Be 

 quick." When I touched the third — D — Miss 

 .Mary, on her entrance, was saluted by her sLster 

 witli the words— ''Do you think you can tell?" 

 After T had tourhed the first paper, A. Mips Alaiv 



was asked — " Are yon sure you can guess ?" — 

 and when I touched C, Miss Catherine said ro 

 Miss Mary, "Come and try once more." And thus, 

 by commencing each sentence with the letter 

 that had just been touched, she unfailingly point- 

 ed out to her sister the exact paper. To succeed 

 in this little trick, there must, of course, be an un- 

 derstanding between the two persons that exhib- 

 it it : and to most of the uninitiated it appears 

 very surprising. By adopting a similar plan of 

 collusion, some of the professors of IVlesmerism 

 have contrived to obtain from the magnetized 

 sleepers, replies, which, to the audience, seemed 

 truly astonishing. 



We now arose to fake onr leave ; anrl our at- 

 tention was then directed to a square pine table 

 standing by one of the windows, and covered with 

 particularly uninviting specimens of pin-cush- 

 ions, needle-books, emery-bags, &.c. The old la- 

 dies informed us that this was a charity talile, 

 which they kept for the benefit of " the poor." 1 

 had thought that the Miss Byleses were their own 

 poor. However, we gratified them by adding a 

 trifling sum to their means of doing good ; and I 

 became the proprietor of the ugliest needle-book 

 I had ever seen. But I magnanimously left the 

 less ngly things to tempt the choice of those per- 

 sons who really make an object of their purcha- 

 ses at charity tables. " Dear good little me." 



The Miss Byleses were very urgent in inviting 

 me to repeat my visit, saying, that any time of the 

 day after nine o'clock, they 'were always ready to 

 see company, and would be happy to receive me 

 and such friends as I might wish to bring with 

 nie, — and they enumerated among their visitors, 

 from other parts of the Union, some highly emi- 

 nent personages.. 



While we were listening to the " more last 

 words" of S.tiss Catharine, her sister slipjied out 

 into the very short passage that led to the house 

 door, and then slipped back again. We, at last, 

 paid our parting compliaients, and Miss Mary es- 

 corted ns to the front door, but seemed to find it 

 locked, and seemed to find it impossible to un- 

 lock. This gave her occasion to say' wittily— 

 " The ladies will have to send home lor their 

 uigbt-caps; as they are Jikely to be kept here all 

 night." Luckily, howeve.r, this necessity was ob- 

 viated, by the key yielding as soon as it was turn- 

 ed the right way : and fint'lly Miss Mary Byles 

 curtsied and smiled us out. 



Having thus become acquainJcd with the two 

 Miss Byleses, and understanding that they were 

 alwaysdelighted when strangers were brought 

 to see them'in a similar manner, larterwards be- 

 came the introducer of several frieneLs from oth- 

 er cities, who successively visited Bo.«!Xon in the 

 course of that aunimer, and who expressed a de- 

 sire to pay their compliments to these singular 

 old ladies. 



In every instance, the same routine was pur- 

 sued upon these occasions by the two sisters, and 

 the practice of nearly half a century had, of course 

 made them perfect "in it. I was told by a lady 

 who had known tlie Miss Byleses long and inti- 

 mately, and had introduced to llieni, at their 

 house not less than fifty persons, that she had 

 never observed the slightest variation in their 

 usual series of sayings and doings. And so I al- 

 ways found it, whenever I brought them a new 

 visitor. Miss Mary always came to receive us at 

 the front door, — and Miss Catherine always pro- 

 duced her own effect by not making her own ap- 

 pearance till we had sat sometime in the parlour. 

 The attention of the stranger was always, in the 

 same words, directed to the cornelian ring on 

 their father's picture, and always the new guests 

 were placed in the great carved chair, and the 

 same wonder was expressed that "they should 

 sit easy under the crown." Always did their 

 visitorhear the history of "their nephew, poor 

 bov, whom they had not seen for forty years." 

 Always did Miss Catherine with the same diffi- 

 dence exhibit the snake,— and always was the 

 snake unwilling to re-enter his box, till he had 

 been brought to obedience by a little wholesome 

 chastisement. The astounding tric'k ofthe al- 

 phabetical bits of paper was unfailingly shown ; 

 and, always when the visiters gave symptoms of 

 departure^ did Miss Mary slip out of tin room, 

 and lock the front door, that she might have an 

 op[)ortunity of.repeaiing her excellent joke about 

 the ladies' night caps. 



I must do the Miss Byleses the justice to say, 

 that they appeared to much less advantage on 

 these the first visits of new people, than to those 

 among the initiated, who took sufficient interest 

 in them to cultivate an alter acquaintance. I 

 went sometimes alone to sit an hour with thetn 

 to>vards the decline of a summer afternoon, — and 

 then I always found them infinitely more rational 

 than when " putting themselves through their 

 facings," to show off' to strangers. In the course 

 of these quiet visits, tiiey told me many little cir- 

 cumstances roiiiiPcti'. I uiili the royalist .side of 

 our revohitii.D.iiy roiiicM, that I could scarcely 

 have ohtaiiiiil Innii any other source, — the few 

 persons yet renuiiuiiig among us that were lories 

 during that eventtid period, taking care to say as 

 little about it as possible : and every one is 

 so considerate as to ask them no questions on a 

 subject so sore to them. 



But with the daughters of Dr. Byles, the case 

 wasqinte different. "They gloried, — they triumph- 

 ed, in the firm adherence of their father and his 

 fanjily to the royalty of England, — and scorned 

 the idea of even now being classed among the 

 citoymnes of a republic ; a repuhlic which, as they 

 said, ihey had never acknowledged, and never 

 would; regarding themselves still as faithful sub- 

 jects to the majesty, of Britain, whoever that 

 majesty might be. Of the kings that they knew 

 of| they had a decided preference for George the 

 Third, as the monarch of their youthful days, and 

 under whom the most important events of their 

 lives had taken place. All since the revolution 

 was nearly a blank in their memories; — they da- 

 ted almost entirely from that period, — and since 

 then, they had acquired hut a scanty accession to 

 the number of their ideas. From their visitors 

 they learnt little or nothing, as they always had 

 the chief of the talk to themselves. With English 

 history, and with the writers ofthe first halfofthe 

 last century they were somewhat conversant, but 

 all that had transpired in the literary and political 

 world since the peace of '83, was to them indis- 

 tinct and shadowy as the images of a dream not 

 worth remembering. But they talk of what, to 

 us, is now the olden time with a vividness of rec- 

 ollectinu that seemed as if the things had occur- 

 red but yesterday. In the coloring of their pic- 

 tures, 1 of course, made allowance for the pre- 

 dominant tinge of toryisni, and who for a large 

 portion ofthe lingering vanity, which I regarded 

 indulgently, because it injured no one, and their 

 self-satisfaction added to the happiness of these 

 insolated old ladies. They once showed me, in 

 an upper room, portraits of themselves at the age 

 of seventeen and eighteen, painted by Pelham, 

 the brother-in-law, 1 believe, of Copley. The 

 pictures were tolerably executed ; and I think 

 they must have been likenesses, for the faded fa- 

 ces ofthe octagenarian sisters still retained some 

 resemblance to their youthful prototy|)es. The 

 Miss Byleses were not depicted injthe prevailing 

 costume of that period. They had neither hoop- 

 petticoats, stomachers,nor powdered heads, — both 

 were represented in a species of nondescript 

 garments, imagined by the painter, — and for head 

 gear, Miss Catherine had her own fair locks in a 

 state of nature, — and Miss Mwy a thing like a 

 small turban. 



From their own account they must have been 

 regarded somewhat in the light of belles by the 

 British ofKcer.s. They talked of walking on the 

 Common arm in arm with General Howe and 

 Lord Percy: both of whom, they said, were fre- 

 quent visitors at the house, and often took lea 

 and spent the evening there. 



1 imagined the heir of Northumberland, taking 

 his tea in the old parlor, by the old fire-place, at 

 the old tea-table, — entertained by the witticisms 

 of Dr. Byles, and the pretlinesses of his daugh- 

 ters ; who, of course, were t!ie envy of all the 

 female tories of Boston, at least of those who 

 could not aspire to the honor of being talked to 

 by English noblemen. Moreover, Lord Percy 

 frequently ordered the band of his regiment to 

 play under the chesnnt trees, for the gratification 

 ofthe Miss Bylses, who then, as they said, had 

 'God save the King" in perfi-ction. 



The venerable ladies told me that the imifuacy 

 of their family with the orincipal- British oflicers 

 liecaine so well known, that In a short time they 

 foimd it expedient to close their shutters before 

 dark as the lights gleaming through the parlor 

 windows made the house ot Dr. Byles, a mark 

 for the Americans to fire at fioni their foilifica- 



