128 



GLEANINGS IN BEE CULTURE. 



Feb. 



ADVICE TO HUSBANDS. 



HUSBANDS, BE GOOD TO YOUR WIVES WHII^E YOU 

 AND THEY ARE ALIVE. 



T WONDER how many of the readers of Glean- 

 £|f INOS are reading Talmage's sermons to the 

 '^i women ot America. Somebody sent me a 



"*■ paper eontiiining his sermon, " Marriage for 

 Worldly Success, Without Regard to Char- 

 acter," and I think it one of the best sermons that 

 1 ever read. There is one of the wittiest sentences 

 in it that [ ever saw in a sermon, and it is a truth at 

 the same time. I wonder at any preacher having 

 the courage to say it. However, Talmage's sermons 

 are to women who are ?i'i/ married: mine are for 

 husbands. 



A few years ago I stood by a young man at the 

 open grave uf liis young wife. 1 have been at many 

 funerals; I have seen the sorrow of wives for de- 

 parted husbands; ihe sorrow of children for a lov- 

 ing mother; the sorrow of a lover for his sweet- 

 heart; the sorrow of brothers for an only sister, 

 and the sorrow of a mother for her babe; but 

 never have I witnessed such sorrow as this. It was 

 the kind of unreasoning sorrow that makes a man 

 want to put a bullet in bis brain or through his 

 heart. Then after tlie funeral he talked tome- 

 talked as I never heard a man talk before. ] tried 

 to stop him; he said he must talk to somebody; then 

 such an upbraiding, such a self-lashing, no man 

 ever gave liimself before. He wanted to die; he 

 was not lit to live; he called on God to witness that 

 he had treated his wife like a brute; liow he had 

 gone out of his way to tease and torment her; had 

 found fault witli her cooking when there had really 

 and truly been no fault to find; he had accused her 

 time and again of being wasteful when he knew in 

 his heart that she was an economical and saving 

 woman; that he ha(i— here was the crowning stroke 

 of all— had accused her of infidelity to him, just to 

 taunt her and break her spirit. I let him talk him- 

 self out. Then I said, " I knew all this before; and 

 now I want you to promise me two things: That 

 you will put away all thoughts of suicide. A man 

 with six little children has no right to kill himself, 

 however much he may wish to die; and that you 

 tell no one else what you have ,iust told mo. It can 

 do no good to tell it to the neighbors for them to 

 gloat over; so, what is the use?" He promised, 

 and now he is married again, and here is the mir- 

 acle—a better husband was never seen than that 

 same man. His last wife is not so good a cook as 

 his first, but he never finds fault with her cooking; 

 the babies cry now, just as they did then, but he 

 is never cross; there are dark days, and days when 

 the wind is in the east, but he pays no heed; he goes 

 quietly on his way, good humored, and looking (wer a 

 thousand little things. When I see him I think, "What 

 pity— what a great, gcf a? pity, that he did not know 

 how to conquer himself before!" The time for a 

 man to be good to his wife— to be on his good be- 

 havior-is when the children are little— when the 

 wife, with a child or two clinging to her dress, and 

 another in her arms, is trying to do her own work 

 to save the money a hired girl would cost; then is 

 the time a husband needs to put his opinions about 

 cooking and housekeeping out of sight; take the 

 hat from off his head and the shoes from off his feet, 

 and say, " Lord, Lord, what wilt thou have me to 



the 



place on which he stands is holy 

 Mahala B. Chaddock. 



do?" for 

 ground. 

 Vermont, 111. 



Amen, Mrs. Chaddock I May God help us 

 to do exactly as you say, in this matter. The 

 Bible says, " Thou shalt love thy neighbor 

 as thyself;"' and when that neighbor hap- 

 pens "to be a man's own wife, it would be 

 sad indeed if he could not tulfill the com- 

 mand. Your article calls to mind a sentence 

 or two that Mrs. Root cut out of Seedtime 

 and Harvest. The talk, however, happens to 

 be to wives ; but as it strikes on the same 

 point, I think it will tit nicely right here : 



You would despise yourself, if, tossed into a great 

 sea, you make no struggle for a boat, a buoy, or the 

 shore. So, when you find yourself almost over- 

 whelmed with worries and care, and the steak is 

 burning, the baby fallen out of bed, and your hus- 

 band suddenly wants a button sewed on— hold the 

 babe with one arm, lift the steak with the other, 

 and tell John to bring you a needle and thread. 

 Say no more. There are times when silence is not 

 only golden but diamonds, and this is one of them. 



N'ow, then, my point is. that a husband 

 who can not take in the state of affairs at 

 such a time, and behave himself as if he 

 were really standing on " sacred ground," 

 as you put it — well, he needs thorough, 

 sound conversion. 



AVOMAN'S -WORK. 



WHAT SHALL WE DO TO BREAK THE MONOTONY 

 OF IT? 



fRIEND ROOT:— Did you ever think how differ- 

 ently men and women, particularly those who 

 live on farms, spend their evenings? The 

 good mother is rarely found without some 

 work in her hand. Little children, and big 

 ones too, make lots of mending. The little stockings 

 need darning, or some fingers will be cold to-mor- 

 row, if those mittens are not done. After supper 

 there are the dishes to do up. and preparations for 

 bi-eakfast. It seems almost impossible for the good 

 wife and mother, with little cliildren, to get any 

 time, even evenings, to read. How is it with the 

 husband and father? Why. as a rule he sits down 

 after supper, without a care, sind enjoys his paper or 

 his books, or chats with a neighbor who comes in. 

 Now, isn't this about true, and isn't it entirely 

 wi'ong, that man's work should stop three or four 

 hours before woman's, and that, meanwhile, he 

 should be filling his mind with useful information, 

 or getting choice entertainment that is denied to 

 his wife? 



To be sure, this is common custom, and custom 

 makes law; but it doesn't make right. Woman's 

 work, in its endless monotony, is as hard as ours; 

 and there is no justice in " man's work being from 

 sun tin sun, and woman's work never done." I do 

 not see how a thoroughly Christianized man can sit 

 down and selfishly enjoy himself, while his equally 

 tired wife is drudging on. There is a little of the 

 old barbarous idea that women are mere slaves 

 remainingthere, if not in thought, certainly in prac' 

 tice. If every mother who has been killed by this 

 never-ending, never-changing drudgery, could have 

 it plainly so stated onher tombstone, wouldn't there 

 be a stir in this country? What is to be done about 

 it? Every good, true husband, after his attention 

 is once called to it, will see that some remedy is 

 found. It may be by buying more things ready 



