1897 



c;lkanixgs in hhk cui/ruRiv. 



f)48 



wonder if tlieu' arc no hf(.'-kocjHrs around 

 I'ordhook I'ann. 



Our Neighbors. 



And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye 

 also to them likewise.— H'ke 6 :31. 



I toUI yon of the many attractions constant- 

 ly exhibited at that g^reat bathing - place, 

 Atlantic Cily. Troniinent among tliem was 

 the comparatively new vitascope, a most won- 

 derful invention in optics. It really amounts 

 to a photograph of living moving figures. 

 Here were perhaps a dozen or more of these 

 instruments, each one having different sub- 

 jects. Friend Selser and I looked at a few of 

 them; but several of the subjects that I knew 

 by reputation, and some I had seen in differ- 

 ent cities, I told him were, in n\y opinion, un- 

 fit for any one to look at. It gave me pain to 

 notice these were the very ones most patron- 

 ized. While we were standing near one of the 

 places of exhibition, friend Selser met an 

 acquaintance; and while they were talking I 

 looked about me, and especially studied with 

 deep attention the great throng of humanity 

 then on every side, for it was toward the mid- 

 dle of the day. Right near me was one of the 

 vitascopes, labeled ' ' Working the Typewrit- 

 er," or something similar. I had avoided it 

 before, for I knew something of what it was; 

 but this one, judg.iiig from its shopworn look, 

 had been handled most of all; and while I 

 was waiting I thought that perhaps it would 

 be a good plan for me to investigate and see 

 just luliy this one attracted more attention 

 than the others. I dropped my nickel into 

 the slot, and commenced to turn the crank 

 slowly, according to directions. The scene 

 was a business office — clerks hurrying here 

 and there, typewriters flying rapidly, boss 

 giving orders, etc. In the foreground was a 

 very pretty girl hard at work with a type- 

 writer. A good-looking man with gray hairs 

 and gray whiskers sat near reading a letter. 

 In the opening scene there were quite a num- 

 ber of clerks in the oiTice, as I have told you; 

 but one by one they seemed to take their de- 

 parture. Perhaps it was toward the closing 

 hours of business. Finally the pretty girl and 

 the boss were alone. He hitched his chair a 

 little nearer to his clerk. Pretty soon, look- 

 ing about, evidently to see that the room was 

 empty, he patted her on the cheek; and it was 

 not long after that before they were exchang- 

 ing kisses. At length she stopped her work 

 and put her arms around his neck, he likewise 

 clasping her as if he might have been her 

 father, and she a girl of ten or twelve. Her 

 looks, however, indicated her to be twice that 

 age. Just about this crisis a middle-aged fine- 

 looking woman was seen cautiously coming 

 into the room with noiseless steps. vShe came 

 unperceived until she stood over the guilty 

 couple. The girl, in her fright, jumped up 

 and retreated, while our friencl with the gray 

 hairs went down on his knees Vjefore his in- 

 dignant wife, and in a most humiliating wa}' 

 begged to be forgiven, no doubt promising 



that such a thing should "never happen 

 again." 



I presume .some time and money were spent 

 in getting up this little tableau or theatrical, 

 or whatever you may want to call it. The 

 look of righteous indignation which .shone 

 from the fine-looking woman's face seemed as 

 if it could hardly have been put on. Then 

 the shamefaced, cringing manner of the gray- 

 haired sinner, and his more youthful compan- 

 ion, the typewriter girl, was more than reality. 

 The woman listened to her liusl)and's apolo- 

 gies and promises with some .softening in her 

 countenance, but she turned about and glared 

 at the typewriter girl, shaking her fist at her 

 meanwhile, and saying by her looks, plainer 

 than any words could say it, "As for yoit, you 

 good-for-nothing hussy, see that you never 

 darken the doors of this office again ; ' ' and 

 that was the finale. If you were to turn the 

 crank any further you would commence over 

 again with the office full of clerks, and every 

 thing in proper decorum. 



Now, you may wonder why I go over this. 

 Perhaps almost everybody has seen it. They 

 pay their nickels and have a big laugh, and 

 tell their friends about it, and it is ( or doubt- 

 less was) the funny thing of the season. Let 

 me digress a little. 



To fill out my program of visiting a number 

 of seedsmen and their grounds at Philadel- 

 phia, friend Selser said we should have to do 

 quite a little traveling. When we got on to 

 the trolley-cars, to make any thing of a trip 

 he got permission to put me in front beside 

 the driver, and it was a rare treat indeed. I 

 not only saw the wonderful sights of the great 

 city as friend Selser pointed them out, but I 

 received a great deal of information in regard 

 to the rules and regulations for running elec- 

 tric cars. Almost constantl}-, especially dur- 

 ing the bus}^ part of the day, on Market and 

 Chestnut Streets, the crowd w'ould be so great 

 that it seemed as if somebod}' would certainly 

 be hurt ; but I did not see an accident. At 

 the crossing of the car-tracks the cars follow 

 each other so closely that a novice like my- 

 self would think there must be a collision. At 

 one time our car was going down quite an in- 

 cline. At the bottom of this incline another 

 car-line crossed ours at right angles, but there 

 was scarcely any slacking up in order to pass. 

 Our car went down the hill like a shot ; and 

 when within a very few feet of a car loaded 

 with human beings it would slack up just 

 enough to let said car whizz by. Sometimes 

 it seemed a question as to which driver had 

 the right of way ; but I was told there were 

 rules governing this thing, and that the driv- 

 ers rarely or never made a mistake. Two cars 

 would approach each other as if they were 

 going to collide, with terrible consequences ; 

 but one would always slacken up just enough 

 (and no more) to let the other glide out of 

 the way. 



Now, if you please, let us suppose that one 

 of the drivers — the one going down hill, for 

 instance — were a vicious man. Suppose he 

 should run into a carload of passengers — pos- 

 sibly a family of little children. Suppose he 

 were to smash the car into splinters, and throw- 



