OCTOBKR, 1917 



G 1. E A N I N G S IN BEE C U I. T U K E 



813 



Around the Office — Continued 



figgering on giving any account for them at 

 all — they ain 't worth accounting for. That 

 gets him off my back, right straight. Then 

 a well-meaning soul out at Morrill, Kas., 

 quotes Ephesians 5:4 on me, which same 

 text apjiears to be mostly about foolish 

 talking and jesting and doesn't seem to be 

 l)oosting it very much. He sends along a 

 newspaper clipping to prove that " durn it" 

 and ''blame it" and "ding it" mean some- 

 thing else and that "gosh" and "golly" 

 mean something else worser still. That old 

 Faint can just slip down off my back when 

 I tell him I don 't mean these ever to mean 

 anything else than they do mean^and Cor- 

 inthians 13:5. I guess when he gets that 

 one of Paul 's soaked into his skin a-plenty 

 he won't pass me any more Eph. 5:4, so-he 

 won't. But I have kept the biggest shilla- 

 lah in my whole whang-doodle for the grand 

 linale of this argument. I figger it's a 

 humdinger for me and a fareyewell right 

 for all hostiles trying to pinch off my salarv. 

 (Jet ready! There's one -PEEACHEE ever- 

 lastingly on my side. He lives down at 

 Josephine, Indiana Co., Pa. He 's come 

 right out bold on my side, too, and says I 

 have been furnishing texts for his sermons. 

 Here is what he writes to the editors: 

 "Tell Grandpa Eoot not to be too hard on 

 M.-A.-O., for his lost 'extracter' handle 

 story. I have had one sermon out of it 

 already — subject, 'The Other Fellow's 

 Viewpoint.' I am working on another one 

 — subject, 'The Lost Coin, or the Pearl of 

 Great Price.' " I guess that'll put the ter- 

 minal binger on 'em and make 'em all get 

 off, won't it? Or,- as the vulgar populace 

 would say, "I guess that will hold 'em for 



awhile.' ' 



* * * 



I '11 bet Job had been trying to conduct 

 an " Around-the-Office" column in Glean- 

 ings in Camel Culture, published at Uz, 

 Chaldea, when he let out that groan about 

 wanting to hit into a place where "the 

 wicked cease from troubling and the weary 

 be at rest. ' ' It just seems to lose a man 

 all his friends, and he probably said that 

 right after everybody had gone back on 

 him and when the cabbage worms were like- 

 ly at their worst. I know about it. I am 

 right-there-Eli today myself. The last 

 friend to desert was the old family cat, this 

 morning. She was purring away in my lap 

 as I sat recuperating after the regvilar six 

 A. M. cabbage-worm battle in my garden, 

 whereby I and my nervous system were being 

 greatly soothed, when she suddenlj^ rose up 

 William Eiley in a XXX triple-plated fit. 

 It was the greatest all-around fit, in many 

 respects, I have ever seen fitted onto a eat. 

 The first thing I noticed, or thought I 

 noticed, was that she departed. She seemed 

 to leave via my left chest region, left shoul- 

 der, left ear and left side head top. Any 

 way, her general direction was upwards in 

 a hurry. How I know mostly is that 



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306 E. 5th St.. Canton. O. 



A KIND WORD TO M.-A.O. FROM OUR I.ONG • TIMK 

 FRIEND, IRVING KECK. 



I have just read your contribution to the August 

 Gleanings. I am glad you have decided not to he 

 bounced. I have been an interested reader of 

 Gleanings for over 30 years, and have visited .\. I. 

 in his home at Bradentown, and have had him in 

 my home here, so I know something of Uncle .Vmos 

 and his peculiarities. The younger Roots I have 

 not met, but among you I imagine Uncle Amos is 

 needed to keep a steady rein on the colts of the 

 establishment. I have just read the July issue also, 

 about Uncle Amos looking at the robust figure of 

 the lady with the developer to sell. It was the cause 

 of a very broad grin in this household. But may 

 Uncle Amos ride many more hobbies, and may one 

 of them be to keep " M.-A.-O." in Gleanings". 



Bowling Green, Fla., Aug. 22. Irving Keck. 



" HOW TO BE HAPPY." 



Dear Brother Root: — Your splendid little tract, 

 " How to be Happy when People Abuse You," hit 

 me where I live. It has done me much good in 

 showing me myself. May its good work go out I 

 want to use about twenty-five of these if yon will 

 send them to mc. 



Hancock, la., Sept. 2. Harrv W. Hansen. 



