88 



THE GENESEE FARMER. 



Thi? various families of Potatoes in cultivation having 

 decided to hold a Convention, they duly met, and, after 

 the meeting was called to order and a great Eohan ap- 

 pointed Chairman, Lady's Finger was duly chosen Secre- 

 tary, who, using a mushroom as desk, proceeded to take 

 notes of the proceediugs. She is noted for the number of 

 lier eyes, and her appointment gave general satisfaction. 



Peach Blossom opened the Convention in his usual 

 flowery manner, and introduced a resolution to organize a 

 Society to be named " The Society for the Amelioration 

 of the Condition of Potatoes." He claimed that many 

 members of the family would be greatly improved by a 

 mealier condition of their systems and stated that his own 

 hijih condition aud reputation were largely due to his 

 mealiness of texture, as well as to his largeness of size. 

 He did not wish to " blow'" hard or " pufl'" any system ; but 

 a more elegant color was much needed by many of the race. 



Merino next took the floor, in opposition to the resolu- 

 tion. It seemed to him but a plan to endeavor to make 

 the whole family more palatable to the monster Man. 

 Potatoes will get into hot water soon enough without 

 using any extra efforts. Merino had no desire to be put 

 down. The interests of the Convention were rast, and 

 he would advise that they plant themselves firmly in their 

 true positions. 



Prince Albert differed from Merino, advocated the reso- 

 lution, which he heartily seconded. Entertained the high- 

 est respect for all potatoes, though some were fitter sub- 

 jects for steam and starch than others. Could produce 500 

 bushels per acre, and defied others to do as well. Spoke 

 of his eye-brow over his eyes, and asked gentlemen if 

 tliey saw anything green there ? Any way, his health was 

 always good, and no cancer had yet appeared on his face, 

 and his only sufferings were from boils and tubercular 

 consumption. Took first premium at State Fairs in 1857, 

 1853 and 1859. 



Early June thought that Prince Albert must have 

 recently come from a potato ball. Some of the older 

 sorts had most evidently been run into the ground, while 

 the newer ones were run to seed. Some were very watery 

 and needed the amelioration spoken of. The sooner they 

 were allowed to " go to pot" the better. (Cries of " dry 

 up.") Moved an amendment, that "No potato hereafter 

 be in any way connected with a broil." 



The Chair decided the amendment out of order. 



PinJceye advocated improved cultivation ; knew it to be 

 a " liarrrowing" subject, but hoped always to be able to 

 " come up to the scratch." 



Kidney opposed the resolution ; thought there were 

 societies enough. Potatoes were doing well enough. He 

 found that among all the Mils that flesh is heir to, he was 

 benefitted by viewing them couleur de roics. Moved to 

 " lay the resolution on the table." 



The Chair thought Kidney might go "on the table" 

 himself, and decided the motion out of order. 



Mercer felt blue : was not mercenary, but wanted to 

 please. A brother of his had fairly turned pale in his 

 efforts to please, and was called an A No. 1 sort. . 



Mexican defended Early June, who was one of the dryest 

 of the family, and ought not to be told to " dry up." Such 

 exclamations furnished food for thought, while potatoes 

 that were thus abusive he considered were not fit " food 

 for pigs." 



Chair said Mexican, was slightly personal. 



Mexican appealed, and the Chair thought Mexican would 

 be peeled soon enough ; adding, " Unless you are quiet, 

 sir, you'll be dished." 



The Chairman thought that members had expressed 

 themselves sufficiently as to the resolution, and put the 

 question as to the organization of the Society, when, in 

 spite ot the previous apparent opposition, the resolution 

 passed — aU eyes. 



