ABOUT BUYING A HORSE. 127 



employ in preference to any of the others. He beats time 

 with it, marking, as it were, the first note of each bar. 



■ 



Happy Thought {whfch I keep to myself because it would 

 be lost on the Ostler). — If " time flies," and Jarvis's Horse 

 can beat time on the road, at what a trem.endous pace 

 Jarvis's Horse must go. Work this out, and put it down to 

 Sydney Smith. 



I remark, on this leg, to the Ostler. 



'' He seems," I say diffidently, not liking to pronounce 

 that he actually does what I am going to complain of — and 

 after all I may be deceived, and the Ostler must be con- 

 sidered as an expert — " He seems," I say, " to rather stump 

 on his near fore-leg." 



The Ostler is a man of very few words. He spares one or 

 two for me. " Lor', no. Sir," he replies, huskily, and without 

 turning. 



Now, if ever I saw a stumper with my own very dear eyes, 

 that stumper is before me, and is the near fore-leg of Jarvis's 

 horse. And if ever I heard a stumper, that stumper is the 

 positive negative of my proposition conveyed in the Ostler's 

 reply. 



Now, which is right? — he or I ? Can I doubt my senses 1 

 If so, which sense ? — my sight or my hearing? or both ? I see 

 the horse stump, 1 hear him stump, and I also hear the 

 Ostler deny, totidem verbis, that he does stump. 



Happy Thought. — New sign for an inn. Instead of the 

 ^'Magpie and Stumpy' the '''Horse and Stump:' Will 



