HO AN ANGLER'S BASKET. 



My friend, being a bold man, knocked at the front door of 

 the old fellow's residence, and calmly requested permission 

 to fish for himself and friend, and this was gaanted without 

 a moment's delay, and in five minutes we were at it, and we 

 fished that pond from nine o'clock until noon of an early 

 summer's day, from noon until five, and from five o'clock 

 until the light was growing dim, without seeing the faintest 

 intimation of a fish of any kind. Finally the proprietor came 

 to see how our perseverance had been rewarded. My friend 

 having, if possible, more impudence than I, said, " Mr. 



J , I don't believe there is a fish in this pond." " You 



.are quite right," said Mr. J , " it was as dry as a lime- 

 kiln yesterday ; we only turned the water in this morning." 



We went home then. 



& * 



Two Dutchmen, brothers, who had "travelled life's 

 dull round," ending up a tour in the States, turned into 

 Delmonico's for dinner, which was, as usual, a good dinner, 

 and the bill was to match it. The elder brother, who 

 carried the purse, glanced at the tremendous total, and then 

 rising, with a mighty effort, to a great occasion, let off all 

 the language he had ever heard or could invent, and, having 

 become purple in the face from his exertions and his dinner, 

 finally declared he would not pay a schent. Eventually, of 

 course, he thought better of this resolution, and then, like a 

 defeated general, he proceeded to retire in confusion, using 

 up such odd scraps of infuriated language as he found he 

 had omitted from his first explosion. On the way out a 

 gentleman remonstrated with the irate diner, protesting 

 against the use of such language, and then the younger 

 Dutchman turned upon the elder and said, " Nein, nein, 

 Yawcob, you should not schvear like dot, it ish not right. 

 Besides, Gott has already punished dot man Delmonico." 

 " Punished him?" said the elder, "how?" "Veil," said 

 the younger, " I have got mine pocket full mit schpoons." 



