Past ana Present 119 



To appease his wife, when especially late 

 home, he would commence, as soon as he opened 

 the door, by exclaiming, "AliVe howt tha a coo, 

 Bess. Doos tha hear ? Ah say, Ah've bowt tha 

 a coo ; wi' sike a yeuer as tha niwer seed. 

 Gang an' leeak at her; " or, "Bess, Ah've fetched 

 tha' a noo gown." 



Once, when he had more gin than usual on 

 board, he commenced the following story, which 

 no doubt had its origin over the warm fire at one 

 or the other of the Kirby hostels. Ere his wife 

 could commence to let off steam; "Wait, noo, 

 Bess, wait a minit," he exclaimed, "an' Ah'll tell 

 tha all aboot it. Ho'd on, now. Ah've been 

 huntin' wi' Jack Parker ; tha niwer heeard owt 

 like what Ah's goin' to tell tha ; no, niwer i' tha 

 life. Ah'd just got to t' top 0' 'Ozzy Kirk' 

 (Oswald Kirk) bank, when Jack Parker's hoonds 

 i' full cry after a fox, were comin' ower. Ah turned 

 frightened, and gat into an awd emjjty barrel 

 that somebody had left. T' hoonds cam' loupin' 

 round, an' cocked theear legs ageean t' barrel. 

 Twae on 'em gat theear starns through t' bung 



