118 LOLA 



alone with me. I know of no cause for this, I can only 

 say that I often seemed to " sense " about her a feeling 

 as though she considered these labours superfluous ; 

 as though she had become in a manner " disillusioned " 

 as to the " results " accruing from her work. Was the 

 praise, or were the rewards inadequate ? the fact 

 remains, that on such days utterly senseless answers 

 were the most one could get after constant and persua- 

 sive questioning, while the solutions of her sums would 

 be completely wrong. When once the novelty was 

 gone, indifference and lack of interest soon took its 

 place, and this applies to everything she learnt. In 

 the beginning, close attention, and keen alertness 

 resulting in ready and intelligent replies, then a sudden 

 slackening, so that it would seem useless for me to 

 pursue the same subject again for weeks. This tire- 

 some trait (which, by the way, I can in part appreciate) 

 may, I fear, in time attack her spelling too and then 

 everything will be over, as far as Lola is concerned. 

 Not that she will be getting more stupid with increas- 

 ing age ! indeed, as she grows older, she will probably 

 be better than ever able to understand what is said to 

 her, but she will no longer find it worth her while to 

 pull herself together so as to do decent work. I 

 shall, of course, do all I can as far as trying to influence 

 her so as to put off the evil moment but the fact is 

 that one has here to do with a remarkably sen- 

 sitive and obstinate living-creature, and one that is 

 quite able though in a passive way to maintain its 

 own standpoint. 



I shall now give a few specimens of the almost 

 unintelligible answers dragged from her, as it were, 

 after much grave reproach : 



16 August, 1916 : " Lola, rap something ! " " mal 

 one lif unartig sein." " What is the meaning of ' lif ' ? 



