104 A Peep into a Salad Bowl. 



the cruet, so ; gently mix and increase the action by degrees" (head of 

 hair in commotion, and face brilliant in color) ; " dear me I it is very 

 warm — now, sir, oil in abundance, so ; a dash of vinegar, very light, like 

 the last touches of the artist, and, sir, we have the dressing. Now, take 

 uf) the lettuce by the stalk 1 Break off" the leaves — leaf by leaf— 'shake 

 oflf the water, replace in the salad-bowl, pepper it slightly, pour on the 

 dressing, and there you have it, sir." 

 " Doctor, is that orthodox ?" 



" Sir," replied Dr. Bushwhacker, holdiug the boxwood spoon in one 

 hand and the boxwood fork in the other, " the eyes of thirty centuries 

 are looking down upon me. I know that Frenchmen will sprinkle the 

 lettuce with oil until it is thoroughly saturated ; then, sir, a little pepper; 

 then, sir, salt or not, as it happens ; then, sir, vinaigre by the drop — all 

 very well. Our people, sir, in the State of New Jersey, will dress it with 

 salt, vinegar and pepper — perfectly barbarous, my learned friend — then 

 comes the elaborate Englishman ; and our Pennsylvania friend, the Rev- 

 erend Sydney Smith, sir, gives us a recipe in verse, that shows how they 

 do it there, and at the same time exhibits the deplorable ignorance of 

 that very people. T quote from memory, sir : 



" ' Two large potatoes, passed through kitchen sieve. 



Smoothness and softness to the salad give ; 



Of mordant mustard add a single spoon. 



Distrust the condiment that bites too soon, 



But deem it not. lady of herbs, a fault 



To add a double quantity of salt : 



Four times the spoon with oil of Lucca crown, 



And twice with vinegar procured from town : 



True flavor needs it, and your poet begs 



The pounded yellow of two well-boiled eggs ; 



Let onion atoms lurk within the bowl, 



And, scarce suspected, animate the whole ; 



Then, lastly, in the flavored compound toss 



One magic spoonful of anchovy sauce. 



O, great and glorious ! 0, herbaceous treat ! 



•Twould tempt the dying anchorite to eat ; 



Back to the world he'd turn his weary soul, 



And plunge his fingers in the salad bowl I ' 



" Now, sir, I have tried that, and a compound more execrable is not to 

 be thought of. No, sir I Take some of my salad, and see if you do not 

 dream afterwards of the Greek mythology I" — Wine Press. 



