68 COLLECTOR'S RAMBLES 



out of the opening. Sometimes the performance was 

 varied by the canines pushing their way past the guard 

 and running about the track, followed by the train 

 hands, the train being detained to await their capture. 



People often came to our lectures accompanied by 

 their " intelligent and sagacious " pets. My usual 

 question to a man as he entered was, " Do these dogs 

 belong to you ? " " Yes, sir." " Will you be so kind 

 as to send them home ? We do not allow dogs inside 

 the building." " Right you are. 'Ere, you brutes, 

 'ome with you ! " and away would go the dogs, to 

 return again in five minutes, awaiting a chance to sneak 

 in. On such occasions I usually wore strong, heavy 

 boots, and if chance gave me a good fair kick at " man's 

 faithful friend," he was not likely to return. 



One evening a large black brute came skulking in 

 behind his master. I endeavored by my usual methods 

 to persuade him to retire, but he evaded me, and an 

 English dude, with excessively thin legs, received the 

 full force of my argument on his shin. My copious 

 apologies were drowned in the groans of the " Kickee," 

 who limped away, rubbing his injured member. I ex- 

 pected he would send the police to interview me, but 

 they never came, and he may have died on the way 

 home for aught I know to the contrary. It was too 

 bad. 



Sometimes when the dogs escaped my vigilance, and 

 entered, the lecture-hall was turned into an arena for 



