176 THE TWO ASSES. 



had I intended to give him one, I made up my mind 

 at once to buy Jack, for I saw some fun in him. 

 Now it was not that he was handsome, nor could I 

 judge of his amiability or utility, but as Moore says, 



" Oh 'twas a something more exquisite still ! " 



That Jack could go, my horse could swear ; that he 

 ought to go, the Filho-da-Puta length of his quarters 

 satisfied me ; but, independently of all that, there 

 was a kind of derisive catch-if-you-can twist and 

 twirl of his tail while he was going that was irre- 

 sistible. Seeing me well mounted, the cottager, I 

 suppose, considered a guinea or two, more or less, was 

 no object to me (Mem. he did not know me) ; so he 

 succeeded in diddling me out of three guineas for 

 Jack, (just three times what he would have sold him 

 for in a common way, and have given the Filho-da- 

 Puta quarters and knowing twist of the tail into the 

 bargain,) nor would he then send Jack to my house 

 without the promise of a gallon of beer. I have no 

 doubt the whole family at the cottage thought a good 



deal of business had been done in a short time 



they had sold one ass and found another. I was 

 right after all ; and neither Jack nor I had so much 

 of the ass in us as we looked to have. I put Jack 

 into positive training ; first, in order to see what dif- 

 ference could be made in the animal by such treat- 

 ment ; and, secondly, meaning to astonish the natives 

 at a revel in a village close by with my newly pur- 

 chased racer. He trained on wonderfully, and I 

 found, that, however thistles may be considered by 

 these gentry as a bonne louche, oats made a great 

 change in appearance and spirits. One day, how- 

 ever, I conclude the boy had given him a little more 



